Choose joy.

 

A lot of horrible things have been happening in my life lately and although they have been resolved now, it has taken a toll on me.  I have not only suffered emotionally and physically, but spiritually as well.

You could say that the evil one has been working overtime to destroy me and what I hold most dear to me, and it has taken all my strength to withstand him and to be still standing. Even with God, it was most difficult.

With all the stress, my fibromyalgia flared, my immune system weakened and I succumbed to a (non Covid) upper respiratory infection that felt like the mumps or glandular fever again.

Under attack, I shot up arrow prayers as I gasped for air. It was an intensive battle.

I wrestled with the repercussions of the attack and slowly gained back ground: still standing, I admit I was bloodied and bruised and very wrung out and dry.

Depression overtook me for a while- depression brought on by the evilness of the attack on me and the depths of sin of man... and I struggled to comprehend it.

In prayer, I asked God how can someone- previously a friend, stoop so low as to not only betray but destroy a person? In response, the answer that came into my spirit was "Why be surprised?"

Indeed- Jesus would know the depth of sin and hardness of heart- and the sting of betrayal and deception. His answer gave me some peace and made me appreciate Him more than ever.

In order to get my peace back, I had to let go and let God take care of it. I had to let go of my hurt and let God soothe it. 

I had to let go of vengeful thoughts and let God handle it. I had to let go of thoughts of unforgiveness and let God give me strength to do it.  And He has.

You have to relinquish the desire to see payback in those who have hurt you by praying for them.. And I have.

Why am I writing about this? you ask. Because I would imagine that you are facing a dry spell and have lost your joy now or at some point in your life. And it is so hard to bloom and flourish again. But it's not impossible, in spite of what you feel and think you see. 

This was how I feel, written by a tweeter. "Just because I've been hurt doesn't mean I now have to live hurt. I can get mad and bitter and spread more hurt around. Or, I can choose forgiveness, grace and gentle responses and spread more hope around. Hurt people, hurt people. Healed people, heal people. And I choose to be in that latter group" 

There's a lot at stake in getting your life and peace back again. You have to relinquish control. You have to relinquish revenge. You have to relinquish self-pity and in so doing- you are allowing God to handle that which is most important to you- and you will eventually find a return of your peace and spiritual joy.

Getting your spiritual joy back again takes a lot of faith and prayer, reading the Word, praising the LORD and focusing on that which is true, and right, and just and honourable. But life without it, is a life endured, not lived. Choose joy.

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

‎"You are my hiding place; You preserve me from trouble; You surround me with songs of deliverance. Selah." Psalm 32:7