Ordinary and good!
Micah says it all!
Being a Christian isn't really that difficult. Once one has surrendered his or her life to Christ, the Holy Spirit guides us into that which pleases God.
Our walk with Him is continuous and should lead us to becoming better people than we were yesterday, emulating the Master, Jesus Christ.
As a sufferer of many ailments which cause chronic pain and fatigue, fibromyalgia being the worst culprit, I used to worry about not being able to serve God as well as I did in my younger Christian walk before illnessdep.
Depression would hang around my shoulders like a cloak because I felt unable to do much for Jesus, in fact unable to do much at all for even my family.
Then I had an epiphany! I realised that God can be served mostly by having a loving heart. Besides, His love for us is not dependant on what we do, but on what He has done for us!
God only requires that I love Him with my whole heart, mind and soul, that I love justice and mercy and that I walk humbly with Him. It's nothing to do with limitations brought on by illness or disability or our lack of energy or spoons to do things. Grace is wonderful and my favourite verse in Micah says it all!
© Glenys Robyn Hicks
"He has shown you, O man, what is good; and what does the LORD require of you but to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God?" Micah 6:8
I'm no longer a bunny!
Dead tired
Making the most of my spoons
The Queen of List Making
Clean enough to be healthy
Cooking is a ministry
"When they landed, they saw a charcoal fire there with fish on it, and some bread. Jesus told them, “Bring some of the fish you have just caught.” So Simon Peter went aboard and dragged the net ashore. It was full of large fish, 153, but even with so many, the net was not torn.
“Come, have breakfast,” Jesus said to them. None of the disciples dared to ask Him, “Who are You?” They knew it was the Lord. Jesus came and took the bread and gave it to them, and He did the same with the fish." -John 21:9-12
No spoons required
More than a place to sleep
Searching for some spoons
So Chris wasn't feeling well, so we didn't get out yesterday. I ordered $30 worth of groceries through Woolworths online. We have to pick them up at 1pm. It's so handy to shop like that. After that I need to get some prescriptions made up and go to the Post Office.
I'm my own worst enemy!
It makes my spoons quiver!
It's all I can do this year!
Worth every cent!
I have enjoyed using my Roomba robotic vacuum so much that I have bought another robotic vacuum that also mops the floors.
Our home has lots of tiles on the floor and it takes a good deal of spoons to keep them clean. These two robotic vacuums saves me on energy and pain.
There's been little energy and a lot of pain these last few weeks. My blood pressure is still high even with me resting more. It's a bit of a puzzle really as emotionally I am good-or as good as someone with constant fibromyalgia pain can be. So I am not stressed.
I am enjoying our new home and it is finally decorated and things unpacked. I have also been decluttering and have given away quite a few things that I found were only taking up space without bringing me joy.
Anyway, I highly recommend all Sacrificial Home Keepers get a robotic vacuum- preferably one that mops as well as vacuums. They are coming down in price but I assure you, they are worth every cent!
I am beyond tired!
Half an hour after taking my BP medication, I found I couldn't keep my eyes open, so I went to bed. Woke up a couple of hours later just in time to cook dinner. Dinner wasn't very exciting- a steak sandwich.
Tonight I had to take my usual dose of BP tablets and I am just about to go to bed. It's so frustrating! But with chronic illness, it is what it is!
I have to go back to him in two weeks. He is going to discuss giving me Endep for my fibromyalgia pain.
Unable to sit for long, I have culled a lot of FB groups and deleted my Twitter account. I want to reserve whatever spoons I have to look after Chris and our home. I need to spend more time with him and not on the computer.
This dance with chronic illness has it lead all the way. It steps on your toes and cramps your style. It holds you captive. I just want a break from it. I am beyond tired!
Here a little.
On this new quest
Having patience with yourself
Lately, I have realised that one of the reasons for my high blood pressure is probably in the way I stress about not being able to do what I want due to fibromyalgia.
Although I know that I am not to blame for being ill, I sometimes find myself berating myself and feeling cross that I am a lame duck. It really gets to me at times.
Often I succumb to false guilt, the guilt that comes from matters that are not in my control, and it is easy to go to the Pit of Despair. You do not want to go there.
On rare occasions, I burst into tears and it is then that Chris usually comes to my rescue, pointing out that it's not my fault, that whatever needs to be done can wait or he promises that he will do it...
It made me think that sometimes I am my own worst enemy. By self-condemnation, I am making a sad situation worse for myself.
When I realised that it was my thinking that makes me get so down sometimes, I smiled at the irony: usually I am trying to validate my tiredness and pain to "normals"- those who do not live with chronic pain and no spoons. Now the "normals" are validating me.
So today, after cleaning my kitchen and making lunch, I am going to "the beach" again. I am going to relax and only get up again when it is time to cook tea.
I am going to start to speak to myself as I would speak to someone else who was ill and blaming themselves: lovingly and kindly. Which just doesn't come naturally to me. I have patience with everyone except myself.
It's a pain!
So the day has started off without any appreciable spoons. However, I have purposed to do some chores in the house regardless. Simply because they have to be done.
With the last two days slack on housework, there are dishes and washing and some other chores that are shouting to be done.
My sugars are still 10.4 this morning in spite of taking the new diabetes medications for a week. So I accept that I am never going to feel really well. Fibromyalgia and angina coupled with back pain also seem to do that.
So today's list of to do's are:
- Soak and wash dishes and put away after air drying
- Catch up on the washing and put it away after the dryer has finished
- Cook some lamb stew in the slow cooker for dinner