Sufficient unto the day

 

As  a woman who suffers from chronic illness and pain through fibromyalgia,  I often succumb to bouts of depression. I have a few tips on overcoming it. 

First and foremost, start your day in prayer. Ask God for the strength to face the day and play worship music to lift your spirit.

Try to be in the moment and take one day at a time. That's all we can tackle otherwise, the sense of failure can be overwhelming. We aren't meant to take it on all at once.

If you try to just focus on the next task at hand and not dwell on the future, it will help your attitude to realise that you have accomplished something. It will then snowball as you progress through the day.

With chronic illness, I set myself just one or two daily goals that are achievable: for me it is wash the dishes and put away the clean clothes. I only focus on those goals that I know are achievable and if at the end of the day, they are done, then I feel a sense of accomplishment instead of defeat.

Nothing depresses me more than a feeling that I have achieved nothing all day. I don't worry that others may say "for goodness sake, it's only washing dishes..." for us in the throes of illness, be it mental or physical- it's a big deal. Delight yourself in small victories.

I find that in setting small goals it knocks the cloud of gloom off its perch and makes me hopeful that I will be able to rise above the depression. Give yourself a high five and see that any job you do is a step in the right direction. It still blesses your family and serves the LORD. 

I think when we are depressed and/or in pain, the desire to go Home to the LORD is strong. After all, we are tired of living in a world of pain and we look forward to our redemption. But in saying that, we still have a work to do until that time. 

As FlyLady says, baby steps. But just taking baby steps lead us out of our rut and it is that first baby step that will hasten our healing of depression and sense of failure. 

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

 Sufficient to the day is the evil thereof. Matthew 6:34 

What a drenching!

There's nothing nicer than being in bed listening to the rain on a tin roof. Especially if you don't have to go out in it...

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I took this picture from our back door just after I fed some bread to the birds that frequent our garden. I love the smell of the rain! We are getting some relief from the heat with a top temperature forecast for 21C or 69.8F. 

It was my plan to go to church this morning, but with all the storm activity yesterday my fibromyalgia's flaring and I honestly can't make it. Hopefully, next Sunday will be better.

Usually, I listen to the Bible on You Tube and worship and rest at home when I can't go. Which is often, unfortunately. 

I will be hanging up the clothes I took out to wear there this morning. Later on I will cook some curried sausages in the slow cooker, which is my favourite way of cooking when I am in a flare.

There are a few dishes in the sink soaking in hot soapy water as per Sylvia's Sunday List. I will attend to them later on after I have had a rest. 

It isn't ideal that I am seeking to go back to bed so early in the day, but such is the life of a chronically ill person. I no longer feel any false guilt over it like I did in the early days of finding out what my new normal would be.  I can only get through this flare by resting...

So list of to do's today:

1. Hang up clothes
2. Set slow cooker going with sausages for dinner
3. Rest

And last but not least, I will be rejoicing as more rain falls giving our parched land a drenching! 

First we have tea

We had a very fitful sleep last night due to the temperatures being so high yesterday. Our reverse cycle air conditioner just doesn't make it up to the front of the house and our bedroom is right at the front, faces east and catches the sun all day. It was like an oven in our room with the temp being 23C all night. Our fan only blew hot air around....

It is supposed to be 30C today with thunder storms later. We always have our Emergency phone app on to advise us on fire activity as we live in the country. Last year Chris's son, who lives near us, had to evacuate his family because of fires and this is something we are prepared for. 

In the front guest room we have our important documents, spare medicines and some clothing and our photos on USB  disk. They are easy to grab in case we get the evacuation call. With high fire danger today and lightning strikes a possibility, we have our fire plan in place. Yes, it's firmly in place,  along with our little white cat, Xena's cat cage. Just in case...

I am currently listening to the Bible on You Tube and it is great for times when I am in a fibromyalgia flare and can't take in what I am reading. This is my preferred method of quiet time on days like today when my fibro is bad and I am lacking sleep and spoons. 

So because of lack of spoons and much heat, we plan to stay home today. So far, I have showered, dressed and taken my medications. I have a few things planned for today:

1. I need to fold and put away three loads of washing.
2. I want to make a lamb stew in the slow cooker for dinner (so as not to heat up the kitchen)
3. I want to resume following FlyLady by jumping in wherever the zone is for today.

I usually use FlyLady and Sylvia Britton's Lists for chronically ill women depending on how I feel each day.  I use the List for the day, then I may follow FlyLady's zone for 15mins. Today I am doing 15 minutes of cleaning in Zone 1 in FlyLady.

If I get these three things done today, it will be good. I will just cross off those things I achieve. We will see. But first we have tea. Everything goes better with a cup of tea!

Keeping house in a RV

As you know, we live in a RV. Most people think that life is one big holiday, but to be honest, each day brings its list of chores to be done. As our RV is our home, and we live in it full time, housework fills our days just as it does in a sticks and bricks home.

In an effort to keep my home as I like it, I use a combination of Sylvias' Lists according to the day, and FlyLady On any given day, I won't know which method I will be using until I wake, then it will depend entirely upon how I am feeling.

If I am feeling ill, I will just keep to Sylvias' Lists, just selecting the appropriate day in the sidebar and doing just that. If I feel well enough, I will use FlyLady, checking what Zone I am in at the time and doing a little of that as well as the days List in Sylvias' Lists. It is amazing how much you can fit in in 15 minutes. Usually though, that 15 minutes in my zone is enough to deplete my excess energy.

I don't obsess about it but follow my own methods of homemaking, nor do I allow myself to sink into false guilt - because feeling guilty just saps us of emotional energy we need to direct to something positive.

Chronic illness never goes on holiday so although I have less to keep clean than I had before, I find I still have to watch my spoons and pace myself.

I hope these Lists help you attend to your home as you cope with chronic illness.

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

"So teach [us] to number our days, that we may apply [our] hearts unto wisdom" Psalm 90:12

How others cope with housework

Housework is never-ending...even for the healthy. I've accepted that I won't be able to keep up like I used to, so I make a "master list of simple chores" once a week and try to cross them off as I do them. Heavy or involved cleaning and chores I didn't complete wait until I have help...or occasionally carry over to next weeks list. At least seeing chores marked off my list helps me to feel that I'm still able to do some things... feel more productive even if the list isn't a lengthy one.

I never would have believed it if it weren't me who has CFS. Seriously! Cleaning in steps and pacing yourself is the most helpful. One 'those' days where you just can't do ANYTHING, don't! If you do, you'll regret it for at least the next day or week. Having CFS changes lives and in our own way, we have to figure out what works for us. Having tips like these certainly help!

With CFS I have found it near on impossible to clean as I use to. Out of sheer desperation watching my home turn into a mess camp I came up with easy to cope with steps to cleaning. Delegating the big jobs to the kids is really important - shopping, vacuuming, mopping and yard work. May not be done to your satisfaction but it is important for the kids to do this or get in home care. My jobs are to maintain the bathrooms and toilets and the washing. In the bathroom after I have showered, I use my soiled clothes to wipe over the recess walls - which keeps the mold away. I keep a hand towel by my basin which is more for the basin than myself. I rinse the basin with fresh water after i have used it and wipe it over. At all times until I can manage a deep clean - my bathrooms remain neat and fresh. The laundry is put on at night so that the kids can hang it up for me. I take down what I can manage during the day and process and put away. When I can cook meals - I cook extra and freeze.

I have two sets of bedding. When the dirty set comes off, it goes in the wash. Then instead of folding the sheets (way too hard on my shoulders!) they go in a wicker basket near the bed for the next week. Skipping the linen closet just makes the job easier.

There's another (free) site out there that has a 'program' written primarily for struggling perfectionists, busy parents, and pack rats - but the basic principle works for us as well. Using a small amount of time to focus on a specific task can accomplish more than you think. And getting in the habit of doing things like giving the sink a quick wipe or the toilet a quick swish daily can maintain the cleanliness without it needing to take a lot of time, energy or elbow grease. (Things we're usually lacking.)

The site advises setting a timer for 15 minutes and focusing on one task or one area without multitasking. I adjust that time to fit how I'm feeling that day. The site also has a community forum - and there is a sub-forum for people like us for tips, successes and frustrations. I don't know if urls are allowed but searching for 'flylady' will work. It's free and it's a godsend if you are the type who has trouble finishing a chore as it helps to shift your mindset.

If you wrote this, please contact me so that I can attribute it to you. Thanks. Love it.

Blessings, Glenys

"Where no counsel [is], the people fall: but in the multitude of counselors [there is] safety". Proverbs 11:14

Recognising false guilt

As a chronically ill woman, I know too well the false guilt we all feel when we can't get enough energy up to do what we long to do. We know what we should be doing, and we want to but our bodies are tired and hurting. Although God reminds us and shows us what direction we should be taking, He does understand that our bodies are but dust and has compassion on us. The false guilt comes from the Evil One. Listening to him brings on depression and compounds our problems...

Likewise, we often get in a spin trying to work out how to serve the LORD and we feel that we come way short of the mark during times of illness. We often miss the fact that we are serving Him in our homes and in our family life in spite of not spinning our wheel as fast as we would like. Service starts with a heart choice and doesn't depend on perfection. We can serve God even as we battle illness or fatigue. It's not about how fast we spin our wheel, but if we want to and then try to! And as FlyLady says, "Housework done imperfectly still blesses your family!"

Because I battle with illness constantly and walk that weary path every day, I see that you can have a servant's heart but can still bear an extra load in false guilt. For those of you who do, I pray that you can talk kindly to yourself and learn to have more compassion on yourself- the road is not easy and you will find many others who have fallen along the way, giving up the battle and feeling overwhelmed. I do not believe the LORD wants that for us...

I highly recommend Sylvia of Christian Homekeeper's lists on homemaking for the chronically ill woman. I follow that closely (adapted for my own home) and it helps me no end.... Physically and emotionally. Through following Sylvia's lists, I can usually lay down the burden of false guilt and still have a reasonably clean and tidy home.

May God bless you as you purposely and diligently serve Him in your home, in spite of your pain.

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

Even to your old age, I am He, and even to gray hairs I will carry you!  I have made, and I will bear; even I will carry, and will deliver you.  Isaiah 46:4

Keeping peace in your home

Dear Friends,

Our membership is world wide and every religion! We are the keepers of our homes. It is up to us to set the tone for our families. This may be hard, but we can do it! We can do anything for 15 minutes.

Watch your words to yourself and to your babies. We cannot stereotype a people or a religion because of a few bad men. Fear is their goal! When we let go of this fear we have succeeded at allowing peace to enter our homes.

All any of us can do is take care of our little corner of the world; our homes! You can do this by turning off the TV and Facebook. I fell victim to television many years ago. It literally made me sick from watching the negativity of the news all the time.  I am not saying to put on blinders or not to be concerned for your family members who are in the middle of the news, but what I want you to do is keep the home fires burning. Limit the influx of the media. Their goal is to make it sound as bad a possible and I don’t want their one-sided exaggerations to hurt you or your family!

Focus your fears and sadness by doing something to bless your family! Go shine your sink! Fold laundry! Clean out that craft room! Work on your control journal! Pay your bills! Do not spend all your time in front of boob tube having your brains sucked out by fear! Or checking Facebook every 5 minutes. Unfriend people who spew nastiness and hate. Only friend or like pages that lift you up. 

Your children and your pets are very intuitive. You can’t hide your feelings from them. So you have to insulate yourself from those by limiting your exposure. What you think about your bring about! It is up to us to think good thoughts instead of expending energy on worry; use that power to bless your tiny little corner of the world.  Now is the time for us to do what we can, with what we have, where we are! So what can we do?

Feed our families. Get food in the house. Plan your meals so you feel secure. Pull out your family’s favorite recipes and fix their comfort food. Do it together! Set the good dishes and light candles!  Entertain yourselves with your favorite movies. Make a list of your family’s all time favorites. Look for them at yard sales and clearance racks. Gather up some of your favorite books to read aloud.

Play classical music, gospel music, or your favorite music! Let your spirits be lifted in song your special way! Sing together! Play music on the piano, keyboards, or other instruments. Have a sing along! Sing your favorite holiday songs! Go Caroling! Learn how to sing in harmony! What fun! Drag out the karaoke machines!  (if you haven’t flung them LOL)

Pull out the family board games or a jigsaw puzzle. Sit around your dinner table and play games and talk.  You are not going to be able to isolate your children from all of this, but you can edit what they hear and have it come from you! Worry never made any situation better! If you catch yourself doing this, it is time to take care of you!

Remember what the flight attendant always says when you board a plane: You have to put your oxygen mask on first, before you start to help your child. This means keep up with your simple morning and evening routines, continue to declutter for 15 minutes a day and do the missions for your zone.

Your routines will give you structure and comfort! Do Them!! This means getting dressed to lace-up shoes, fixing your hair and face too! When you start to feel yourself get stressed, then change gears and take care of you! This means give yourself a hug! If you don’t know what to do, then go to our homepage and read the Pamper Section, get in the tub, take a walk, or just sit and listen to the birds sing, light candles, turn on all the lights in the house, open up the curtains and let the sun shine in!

Winter is tough on all of us. We can dream about spring, plan our gardens, and plant seedlings. Dream big! Let’s be ready for any emergency. They keep saying we are going to have a long hard winter.

We can do this. We don’t have to let the bad news disrupt OUR peace in OUR homes.  Are you ready to FLY with peace as your guide? by Marla Cilley aka FlyLady

So teach [us] to number our days, that we may apply [our] hearts unto wisdom.  Psalm 90:12