Crying happy tears!

 

So the last few weeks have been difficult to say the least. We have helped my sister close up her house, moved her in here and found accommodation for my son. 

On top of that, RSV has gone through our home and was pretty horrid. My sister says it was worse than Covid. 

Add a severe fibromyalgia flare to the mix, and you have a very disheartening turn of events.

I have prayed a lot during the last few weeks but haven't been diligent about reading my bible. To be honest, sometimes it was hard just to keep awake.

Today I finally got back into the Word and was immediately drawn to Proverbs 20:20- Whoever curses his father or his mother, His lamp will be put out in deep darkness.

I was immediately convicted of doing this- not actual cursing but speaking badly of particularly my mother, due to a very traumatic childhood.

I repented quickly but even so, I meditated on this during the night, talking to the LORD about it.

During this talk, I asked Him why He has in fact blessed me all these years, and immediately I felt Him tell me that He knew and saw all the past hurt and allowed me to talk it out and slowly release all the pain.

I further felt that now is the day to let it go- really go, and move on. I am amazed at the patience and tenderness that God has shown me and I am so very grateful for His love and forgiveness and mercy.

You may recall my love for kingfishers and how God used to make sure I saw them whenever they came for a feed.  I call them  "love glances"

Fast track to an hour ago as I was preparing lunch. I happened to look out of the glass door from where we feed the birds in the garden.  There was a black and white kingfisher! A love glance! 

My heart burst with love for God and happiness that He still loved me in spite of my many failings! It was just what I needed to lift my spirits... and today like many times before, I cried. 

Tears of gratitude and joy and a deeper joy in my spirit replaced the tears of pain and frustration of the last few weeks.

Finding Jesus is not finding religion- it is having a relationship with God and I am very pleased to report that God met His daughter's emotional needs mightily, for  He glanced at me in a personal way that  made me cry the happiest of tears! 

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

He said, “I am the Lord, the Lord. I am the God who is tender and kind. I am gracious. I am slow to get angry. I am faithful and full of love. Exodus 34:6

Are you appropriately dressed?

There's a lot happening in the world today, both in the natural and the spiritual world. The times are fast paced and frightening.

There is a movement (though not a new one) of the evil one to make being a Christian even harder and we can see and feel the battle between good versus evil.

We cannot stand without putting on the full armor of God. But what exactly is this? Let us find out.

In Ephesians 6, we are told what to do to withstand the evil in each day by making sure we are dressed appropriately for spiritual battle...

• Firstly, we are to strengthen ourselves in the LORD so that through Him we will have strength.

  ¹⁰ Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might.  This means we are to spend time with Him. In prayer. In worship. In the Word.

• We are to put on the whole armor of  God, preparing ourselves for battle, for we are in a battle with the forces of darkness.

¹¹ Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. We have all experienced the cunningness of the devil. The appeal to the senses, the drive to try to separate us from the good Shepherd. It is a constant battle to resist him.

•  We must recognise that the battle is not carnal, but spiritual in unseen wicked spiritual hosts in the heavenly places. Our enemy is unseen, but very real- and active.
  

¹² For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. Although our enemy is unseen, he is not unfelt nor are the results of his influence unnoticed.  Where there is hatred in all its forms, deceit and lies and confusion, there we will know that the enemy is at work, doing what he does best.

• At the end of the day, we must be able to stand. To endure. To live for God another day

¹³ Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. We are to be strong and resolute and daily putting on the armor is the way we can do this!

So what are we to put on exactly in order to stand in the evil day? 

¹⁴ Stand therefore, having girded your waist with truth, having put on the breastplate of righteousness,  We must remember that we have Truth on our side, our heart protected by the breastplate of righteousness.

¹⁵ and having shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace; We are to be peaceable people, bringing the gospel of peace to all, living it, breathing it, sharing it.

¹⁶ above all, taking the shield of faith with which you will be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked one.  We must have our faith intact, a shield that will quench the darts of doubt, fear and double mindedness

¹⁷ And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God; We must go in the joy of our salvation, having been redeemed by the precious Blood of Christ, wielding the sword of the Spirit, deeply ingrained by and knowledgeable of the Word of God.

¹⁸ praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, being watchful to this end with all perseverance and supplication for all the saints  We are to be a person of prayer, in the Spirit and watchful. Constantly praying for ourselves and the saints of God.

 If we faithfully dress in the armor of God, we will stand, knowing that:

⁸ We are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; ⁹ persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed-  2 Corinthians 4:8-9

We have been told how to withstand the evil in these days and it is imperative that we do what the  Word says in order to stand until our fight is done. Are you appropriately dressed? 

  

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

Fear not, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.’ Isaiah 41:10

God's love is a healing balm

There are a lot of faithful Christians who suffer from panic attacks and anxiety.  Although they are usually strong in the faith, when a panic attack hits, and they have a meltdown, their trial turns into a field day for false accusers and Job's Comforters. 

They are often told that they are lacking in faith and to cling to the LORD, when it is chemicals in their body that is causing the problem, not lack of faith.  They do nothing to help but add fuel to the fire. Telling a sufferer of a panic attack to have more faith is like telling a drowning man to swim faster. They simply can't and they struggle just to keep their head above water. To add to their woe, they then fear that they have become apostate or are backsliding.  But nothing could be further from the truth.

The truly backslidden or apostate Christian will not turn to God for help therefore she has no worries of feeling unloved by God but the faithful Child of God will be afraid when she cannot break through the clutch of adrenaline that induces a feeling of impending doom (in this case, damnation) Such feelings are false, and during her life when not suffering an adrenaline rush, she knows this and relies on her Saviour. 

The Bible teaches us not to be anxious, but any anxious person will tell you that it is a fact that anxiety will come for no apparent reason. My point is that Satan will use this hormone induced attack on our bodies to make us feel guilty, alienate us from feeling close to God, and cause us to be more anxious. We know it is written we shouldn't be anxious- but here we are with anxiety and guilt as our companion. 

We know we should trust God but often it's not so clear cut and defined. It does us no good to be told we are sinning when it is clearly a chemistry problem which manifests itself as anxiety. In our stronger moments, we are aware of the scriptures. One who suffers from anxiety does not need to be told they are willfully sinning. We need people's understanding and compassion. It goes without saying, that we always have that from Jesus. 

We tend to forget that most often sufferers of anxiety and panic have often been in the midst of the most horrendous of stresses and trials, often for years, and despite being faithful and clinging to God, they have a meltdown. Trials include all chronic illness such as fibromyalgia and disabilities. 

It would behove us all to remember to be Christ-like to these suffering Children of God and comfort them, pray for them and encourage them. Those of us who suffer like this are prime candidates for panic attacks and meltdowns.  We should do unto others as we would have them do unto us:  pray for them,  help them back on their feet and never judge them. Anxiety and panic are no respecter of people: but by the Grace of God, go I. 

Mercy.  Grace.  Compassion.  Love.  Prayer.  All are healing balms for the poor one having a meltdown. We need to tell them there is hope and there is healing and that nothing can separate us from God's love.

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

For I am persuaded,  that neither death,  nor life,  nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things  to  come,  nor height,  nor depth,  nor any other creature,  shall be  able to separate us from the love of God which in Christ Jesus our Lord.  Romans 8:38-39

May God bring one to you!

Over the years, I have been in hospital countless times and I can say that it's nurses who are dedicated to their profession who have made my stays bearable.

I have had many surgeries and illnesses and by far the most of my admissions were for a spinal condition called Sheurman's Disease.  I was in traction for two weeks at a time and that happened about every 3 months. It was such a trying time.

Unable to sit up, I depended upon the nurses for everything. Bathing, eating, toileting. It was such a drag. But even so, that drag would have been so much worse if it weren't for the good nurses who attended me.

I got to know those who were true nurses and those who were just in it for the money. The true nurses were compassionate, kind and helpful, whereas the others would just plonk my tray in front of me and leave it until a caring nurse would notice it was untouched and come and help me.

Asking for a bedpan was a guage for this as the uncaring nurse would tut because I had emptied my bladder so many times already and she had better things to do... but Florence Nightingale would smile and breeze through it and leave me feeling relaxed instead of tense.

Bathing was another time the true nurse came to the fore... removing my traction- 7lb water bags on each leg.... no grumbling and her only tuts were seeing the blisters under the adhesive strapping that held them on my legs.

Seeing the blisters bursting and leaving raw skin, she took great pains to clean them and after helping me wash in bed, she doctored them and used crepe bandaging for the traction...

I commented that it didnt sting like the last time the other nurse dressed them with pure undiluted methylated spirits, and after hearing this she spluttered and blew up... exiting the ward to address the nurse who was in it for the money about proper treatment of blisters and the need to check on them. She was disgusted with that nurse and even told her so.

Once again it was easy to tell the dedicated nurses from the opportunistic ones... I was grateful for that kind nurse and I told her so. Her response was typical of a kind heart for she told me it was difficult enough for me to endure without developing blisters that kept on being covered again with the same adhesive that had caused the damage in the first place.

I have heard people say of kind nurses that they are angels, and I believe a lot of them by expressing kindness and compassion, emulate them, for they exude the fruit of the Spirit.

So today, if any kind nurses read this, I would like to thank you for making such a dark time in my life (many times over), more bearable. I am grateful and pray there are many more like you. My prayer is should you need help in hospital, that God brings a caring nurse to you.  

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

Beloved, I pray that you may prosper in all things and be in health, just as your soul prospers. 3 John 1:2

I couldn't live with myself

 

I have been grappling with writing what's on my heart lately. As a deep thinker, I ponder daily on what I feel God wants me to write about in this blog. I try to encourage and edify, but I know that sometimes what I speak of upsets some people.

As I looked at myself in the mirror today, I saw a woman whose life is spent mostly on studying the Word of God, praying and blogging in between bouts of chronic illness. It's all I can do now.

Writing's been a passion of mine for the last 30 years after three separate pastors at different services prophesied over me, saying that God has appointed me to be a spokesperson- actually the word was "mouthpiece" for Him throughout the world.

I really took this to heart and started writing Christian personalised verse and self published a book of poetry called "In Spirit And In Truth". It sold at various Christian bookstores, but somehow this didn't seem the way that I was meant to go...

With the advent of the internet, I started blogging and that and writing for various Christian magazines have become my form of service to God. As the blogs and articles circulated, I realised that that was where the "throughout the world" part of the prophecies were coming from...

Apart from obeying God by writing, I realised that I burn with the desire to see the lost being saved and that I do indeed love people. Christian or not. Coloured or not. 

As I combed my hair, I realised that I must write more of Christ and His offer of salvation than focus on our many illnesses and the Corona Virus. Times are short.

I know some who read may take offence, but please recall that I do so out of love and nothing personal to gain. I want you to be saved from the imminent wrath of God for people who prefer to live in their sin than to repent and serve God.

This world is getting darker and very soon Jesus will be taking the Church- His Bride, to be with Him. This is known as the Rapture and only believers will go. 

My prayer is that you will go with us and not be left on this earth which is going to be hell on earth. I need to say it, before it's too late. 

I don't want you to be offended, but saved. God doesn't want anyone to go to Hell, and neither do I. Times are short as I said and we have millenia of prophecies that have come true  to uphold this.

One must be saved or born-again to get to Heaven. Jesus is the only way and that choice must be made personally and voluntarily. Either we accept Jesus and go to Heaven, or we go to Hell.

I have written this post for those who as yet aren't born again, because if I didn't warn you, I couldn't live with myself.

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

He has shown you, O man, what is good; And what does the LORD require of you But to do justly, To love mercy, And to walk humbly with your God? Micah 6:8

Dead tired

A woman who suffers from a chronic illness or disability often finds herself at the end of "normals'" ideas of being tired. We are often looked at with contempt for being so tired that we can't perform our daily duties properly. Or that we have to go to bed early, rise late, or cancel social engagements at the last minute. We are not lazy. 

Before Corona, we were regarded with suspicion when we couldn't make it to church regularly and people harshly judged our spiritual health, deeming us backslidden.  Emotional and spiritual hurt exacerbates our ill state. We feel worse and they lack compassion.

Often we have to cancel doctors' appointments because we are too sick to get there. We find we can't drive and even if we could, we haven't got the strength to even get washed and dressed. It is not unheard of that some of us have crumpled in the shower, unable to get out and totally winded...

Our "tired" goes far beyond a sleepiness or drowsy feeling. We are so fatigued that breathing is too much effort and not for the first time we are grateful it's automatic.

Furthermore, our "tired" is not helped by a nanna nap or even 9 hours of sleep.  We fight our illness and pain even in our dreams and wake up unrefreshed and have to face another day when we haven't recuperated from the day before. We simply have run out of spoons.

"Tired" is overused and doesn't come close to the bone sucking quagmire of desperate fatigue we chronically ill people find ourselves sinking into constantly.  To have "normals" flippantly say, "Me too!" when we tell them we are tired invalidates us and makes us long for their brand of tiredness that can be restored through a good sleep.

We cannot even enjoy a shower or bath to help us sleep as the effort it takes to do this not only drains us of whatever energy we can find, but does not always bring a restorative sleep. Just muscle pain.

Such is my own pain on going to bed that I find I cannot place my arms anywhere comfortable. My fibromyalgia and polymyalgia rheumatica make it impossible to raise my arms upwards and extending them hurts my muscles and tendons. So I go to sleep with my arms folded on my chest.

I indeed look like a cadaver which has been laid out and testifies somewhat to the feeling of being dead in my tracks.  Because that's the type of exhaustion we face every day: we truly feel dead tired.

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

Cast me not off in the time of old age; forsake me not when my strength faileth. Psalm 71:9

Even so, He is Lord!

Chronic illness can make us feel that God is far away, so it is important to remember that our salvation does not rely on our feelings. For which I am truly grateful.

It is also important for us to turn to God when we feel at our worst. He is there to comfort and strengthen us in our worst pain and sadness.

Our faith can take a beating when we are in pain, but if we turn towards God, coming to Him like a tired and sick child, He will show us the depth of His love, compassion and comfort.

Don't berate yourself for feeling like He doesn't care or see... that only compounds our sadness. By turning to Him, even with tears, you will find the Compassion of a God Who understands pain because He died on a cross for you. 

I don't know why God has chosen the path of suffering for me, but it is in that moment that I truly must acknowledge these thoughts and feelings and come to Him regardless. For even so, He is LORD.

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

God is my strength and power: and he maketh my way perfect. 2 Samuel 22:33

Like a cloak round the shoulders

When my youngest child, Dianne had Acute promyelocytic leukaemia, she was dangerously ill and in ICU three times. At one stage her kidneys were failing. Her body was shutting down. 

They put her on dialysis three times and it was touch and go that she would make it through. You can imagine how I felt when they said they thought she was far too deteriorated to make it.

Naturally, I was asked to leave the ICU whilst they hooked her up, and to be honest, I just wanted to be alone. So I went down to the tea room for the patients and their family. 

It suddenly hit me that I may never see Dianne alive again, and the horror of the last few weeks during which she was on chemo and reacted violently to it, overtook me and I cried.

Slumping down in the corner of the tiny tea room, I gave my daughter to God. He had every right to take her Home, but being a mother, I asked Him to spare her.

Goodness knows, Dianne was only 35 years old, a wife, and mother to three young children. She was needed here. Although she was a Christian and I knew she would be with the LORD, I wanted her here with me.

I prayed fervently, agreeing that whatever be His Will for her, that He was God. It was worse than the despair I felt when I gave birth to still born twin girls at 32 weeks. Up until then, I thought that was the worst thing that I had experienced. But I was wrong. Losing Dianne was something I couldn't endure. 

Still slumped in the corner, I was overwhelmed with a peace that didn't make sense. Here we were in an emotional hell on earth, with Dianne's life hanging in the balance, and I was calm.

It was like a cloak of peace had been placed around my shoulders. It warmed me by routing the fear and it exuded a calm that permeated to my marrow.  I knew it was the peace that passes all human understanding that God promises to us.

Because I was calm, I found my legs could still carry me- they were giving way to me in the tea room. I returned to the ICU where Dianne was on the dialysis. 

I sat willing her to breathe and watching her breathing as if the very act  was too tiring for her. I kissed her hand and silently prayed whilst she slept.

Three days later, she was being taught to walk again on the floor of the ICU and her kidney function was restored.  Today, she is in remission for six years. They say it is extremely unlikely she will get APML back again...

This ordeal has shown me that we do have a Saviour Who is very involved in His childrens' lives. He is a good Father Who comforts His children when all else fails.

If Dianne had been called Home, I would not have lost faith in Him. But mercifully, He allowed her to live. 

The warmth of the Peace He gave me in my most extreme anguished pain, is proof to me that He is a God of His Word. He truly gives us peace that is beyond understanding.

Call on the LORD in your own anguish and see that He is a caring and compassionate Father.  There's nothing like His Cloak of Peace around your shoulders.

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.  Philippians 4:7

Her Kinsman-Redeemer!

Through new-born eyes the infant King stares at Mary's face, 
Her deep brown eyes drinking in the sight of Him-
His tiny hand clasped strongly around her finger-
The first touch of God incarnate amongst man.
He is God's own Son-
Her Kinsman-Redeemer.

Through pain-filled eyes the crucified King stares into Mary’s face again,

Entrusting her into John’s care-

Longing to reach out to her with His pierced hands

To bring her the comfort of God -

He is her own Son-

Her Kinsman-Redeemer.

In death His glazed eyes still behold her and all mankind for whom He died,

His bloodied hand now resting on Mary’s shoulder

Comforting her as she cries in her grief –

Even in death loving her,

Her victorious Saviour and evermore

Her Kinsman-Redeemer.

© Glenys Robyn Hicks 

“When Jesus saw His mother, He said, ‘Woman, behold your son!” John 19:26

We aren't just tired: we're dead tired

A woman who suffers from a chronic illness or disability often finds herself at the end of "normals'" ideas of being tired. We are often looked at with contempt for being so tired that we can't perform our daily duties properly. Or that we have to go to bed early, rise late, or cancel social engagements at the last minute. We are not lazy. 

Before Corona, we were regarded with suspicion when we couldn't make it to church regularly and people harshly judged our spiritual health, deeming us backslidden.  Emotional and spiritual hurt exacerbates our ill state. We feel worse and they lack compassion.

Often we have to cancel doctors' appointments because we are too sick to get there. We find we can't drive and even if we could, we haven't got the strength to even get washed and dressed. It is not unheard of that some of us have crumpled in the shower, unable to get out and totally winded...

Our "tired" goes far beyond a sleepiness or drowsy feeling. We are so fatigued that breathing is too much effort and not for the first time we are grateful it's automatic.

Furthermore, our "tired" is not helped by a nanna nap or even 9 hours of sleep.  We fight our illness and pain even in our dreams and wake up unrefreshed and have to face another day when we haven't recuperated from the day before. We simply have run out of spoons.

"Tired" is overused and doesn't come close to the bone sucking quagmire of desperate fatigue we chronically ill people find ourselves sinking into constantly.  To have "normals" flippantly say, "Me too!" when we tell them we are tired invalidates us and makes us long for their brand of tiredness that can be restored through a good sleep.

We cannot even enjoy a shower or bath to help us sleep as the effort it takes to do this not only drains us of whatever energy we can find, but does not always bring a restorative sleep. Just muscle pain.

Such is my own pain on going to bed that I find I cannot place my arms anywhere comfortable. My fibromyalgia and polymyalgia rheumatica make it impossible to raise my arms upwards and extending them hurts my muscles and tendons. So I go to sleep with my arms folded on my chest.

I indeed look like a cadaver which has been laid out and testifies somewhat to the feeling of being dead in my tracks.  Because that's the type of exhaustion we face every day: we truly feel dead tired.

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

Cast me not off in the time of old age; forsake me not when my strength faileth. Psalm 71:9

She got her answers!

The unnamed woman who touched Jesus's hem and was healed inspires me greatly. Not only a woman of faith, but of courage. 

In Jewish family purity law, a woman who has an issue of blood is considered unclean and is set apart from many functions. She is not considered clean until she has immersed herself in a ritual bath called a mikvah ten days after her issue has ceased. This is called Niddah.

For a woman to have an issue of blood for any reason meant she was virtually an outcast until after she was cleansed at the mikvah. Sadly, this woman would have been a lonely and desperate woman who had used all her livelihood on physicians who couldn't heal her.

I can just imagine her thoughts: can I be healed? I have seen Him do miracles. What if He is angry with me for defiling Him? Should I not touch His Hem? But what if He heals me- even me? What do I do?

Such was her desperation, that she risked the humiliation and condemnation by reaching out in faith- and her issue of blood was stanched immediately.

Jesus perceived that the woman had touched Him in faith and He stopped and asked who had touched Him. So many people around, yet Christ knew the touch of faith was different from the usual touch.

Fearfully, the woman confessed in front of all why she had touched His garment. Instead of anger, our LORD answered the woman, comforting her and declaring that through faith in Him, she was indeed healed.

This brave and faithful woman was never named, but her faith has been included in the gospels in Matthew 9:20, Mark 5:25, Luke 8:43-44.

I love the kindness of Christ in healing and comforting a woman suffering from a very lonely and personal condition. Her faith must have pleased Him immensely and it is no mistake that she was mentioned in those 3 gospels as a woman of faith. 

...Can I be healed? I have seen Him do miracles. What if He is angry with me for defiling Him? Should I not touch His Hem? But what if He heals me- even me? What do I do? - her thoughts and fears were met with Love, Grace, healing and no condemnation. What Compassion and Love of the Saviour! 

As I reflect on her story, I marvel that God did not allow her to be named because it would embarrass her, yet He honoured her with an eternal memorial in His Word.  Three times in fact!  Yes, I believe she got her answers! 

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

And, behold, a woman, which was diseased with an issue of blood twelve years, came behind him, and touched the hem of his garment: For she said within herself, if I may but touch his garment, I shall be whole. But Jesus turned him about, and when he saw her, he said, Daughter, be of good comfort, thy faith hath made thee whole. And the woman was made whole from that hour. Matthew 9:20-22 

Chronic illness can't take these things from us

Chronic illness has the power to rob us of joy, movement and motivation and can place such a strain  on us and our families that we actually grieve for the life  we once had. Yet,  it is limited in what it can take, and here are some things it cannot take from us...

• It cannot take our salvation from us
• It cannot take our love for God or His love for us,
• It cannot take our honour, or respect or strength of character.
• It cannot take our courage, our motivation or our hope...
• It cannot take our honesty, our faithfulness to God and family,
• It cannot take our robe of righteousness or God's Spirit within us.

Trying as it is, chronic illness cannot destroy our walk with Christ, or preclude us from serving God in prayer and kindness, even from our bed... It cannot rob us of seeking communion with God or lifting our arms in worship or raising our voices in song...even if we are just mouthing the words...

Chronic  illness can  take our joy at  times,  and perhaps  our life,  but only on the day and hour that  Christ allows  it.  And  the  day it does take our  all,  chronic  illness  will be  replaced  with unimaginable  joy as  God gives us  our robe of  righteousness and our eternal reward... another thing that chronic illness can't take from us!

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulations, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? Romans 8:35

You are doing well!

If you suffer from chronic pain as I do, do you sometimes feel less worthy as a woman, wife, mother and homemaker because of your illness? At times like these, fibromyalgia/CFS, lupus and heart disease can cause chronic pain, and can become very lonely diseases. And self-fulfilling ones.

It does seem unfair that not only do we have this accursed disease but that we feel obliged to defend ourselves constantly! Sometimes even to doctors! Families can often be the worst with their taunts about being a hypochondriac and demanding we get a job! Why don’t they realise just breathing is a job some days and besides which, your joints and muscles feel as stiff as a statue??

Because I walk in your shoes, may I offer you some advice and comfort? Which I know you need as you bear one of the heaviest loads imaginable: chronic pain and illness whilst trying to be a good wife, mother and home maker.

Are we not the best of loving wives and mothers, homemakers, servants of our family and the LORD? We don’t throw in the towel and give up because we can’t- we have our families and home to look after- but we draw on all our innermost reserves to give to our families what is needed when we just want to crawl back into bed and vegetate. Do we? Not as much as we want!

We show great devotion, endurance, and self-sacrifice with our limited energy and draw closer to God than perhaps most healthy women would do. Why? Because it is harder for us! 

Isn't it more valuable in spiritual terms to deny oneself the rest and ease we would love to indulge in, than to achieve the "honour" of having the most spotless of homes etc with relatively little cost as regards personal denial and physical pain? 

Kind of like Jesus's parable of the widow's mite- she gave all she had and the others gave of their abundance! Do you not see the correlation? We give our all, not just a little of the abundance of our strength. Surely then for us, are we not more worthy of honour and appreciation? I would say so!

And so I would encourage you to realise that you do not have to take the taunts and demands to heart, nor let it settle in your spirit. You do not have to defend yourself incessantly to anyone, because you are doing far more already than most people of lesser fortitude would do. Furthermore, God hears our sighs and pleas, He knows we are but dust and knows our frame- He most of all identifies with our weaknesses!

Will He not say "Well done Thou good and faithful servant" Matthew 25:21  to us who struggle to serve others every day when our flesh cries out for compassion and being served ourselves? In moments like these, I cling close to Christ and let His compassion and grace wash over me afresh- for without His closeness I would never get up some mornings! With the Psalmist, let us rely on God for our strength as we cry, "I love you LORD my strength!" Psalm 18:1 I pray you feel His loving help.  You are doing well!

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

A marriage made in Heaven

 

So today is our 23rd wedding anniversary. I am so pleased to tell you that in spite of it being a bumpy ride sometimes owing to family illnesses and drama, we are still very much in love- and grateful to the LORD.

We both believe God brought us together, and it is no coincidence that two weeks after we both prayed for a partner, we met.

I had been living alone for three years after divorcing my violent ex-husband and for the last few months before meeting Chris, I had gone out with a girlfriend I met at Business College. It was easier for us both to go out together, rather than a woman by herself.

Longing for a husband, I remember praying to God and asking Him to find a mate for me. I was feeling desperately alone and I wore that loneliness like a cloak of gloom over my shoulders. In this prayer, I asked God to help me enjoy my life if it was His will that I remain single.

Rising up from my knees, I felt a sense of hope and purpose, and although the prayer was just uttered, I felt happier and more content. Anyway, back to my friend. 

This friend was very hospitable and we often shared a meal at each other's home. She had car problems, and as Chris had been an Automobile Association Road Patrolman in England, and a Royal Automobile Club Victoria Road Patrolman here in Australia, she thought she would ask him to come have a look at it and stay for dinner.

She asked me if I minded if Chris came for dinner, and as I had decided to make more friends and enjoy my singleness, I said that was fine and thought nothing more about it until that evening.

So when I arrived for dinner, Chris was already there and he was seated in the kitchen. I know it is cliche, but it was love at first sight. We were engaged in 2 months and married a year later.

To this day, Chris insists it was a set up, but I can honestly say it wasn't an earthly setup, but we believe it was a heavenly appointment.

As it turned out, Chris came home from work and was feeling alone and despondent. He too wanted a wife- someone to love him, and he prayed. His prayer was almost identical to mine and we worked out it was at about the same time! 

Such was the chemistry between us that our courtship and engagement was a whirlwind romance! We knew it was the LORD'S doing. 

From day one, I have been at Chris's side, working as his jockey in his Courier business. We got to know each other very well and have literally been inseparable. 

We were married in the Melbourne Registry Office 27th June 1998, and renewed our vows with pastors three years ago after my ex-husband passed. This was to include the LORD officially in our marriage as the Registry Office wedding was very quick and clinical. 

We did not get to recite our own vows or include the LORD which was a disappointment to us. So we made it right, even though we lived out our marriage with Him included from day one. 

So today we both reflect on the rapidity of those 24 years since we met and our 23 years of marriage, and we see the LORD'S Hand in it. We have weathered many a storm, yet the good ship Hicks is still very much afloat. 

God has healed us of past hurts in our first marriages: I have learned that there are good kind men in the world and Chris has learned that there are women who love their husbands and are faithful to their vows. 

With grateful hearts, we bless and thank the LORD for His goodness and compassion to us in giving us a marriage made in Heaven.

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

Therefore the Lord waits to be gracious to you, and therefore he exalts himself to show mercy to you. For the Lord is a God of justice; blessed are all those who wait for him. Isaiah 30:18

Nothing can separate us from God's love

There are a lot of faithful Christians who suffer from panic attacks and anxiety.  Although they are usually strong in the faith, when a panic attack hits, and they have a meltdown, their trial turns into a field day for false accusers and Job's Comforters. 

They are often told that they are lacking in faith and to cling to the LORD, when it is chemicals in their body that is causing the problem, not lack of faith.  They do nothing to help but add fuel to the fire. Telling a sufferer of a panic attack to have more faith is like telling a drowning man to swim faster. They simply can't and they struggle just to keep their head above water. To add to their woe, they then fear that they have become apostate or are backsliding.  But nothing could be further from the truth.

The truly backslidden or apostate Christian will not turn to God for help therefore she has no worries of feeling unloved by God but the faithful Child of God will be afraid when she cannot break through the clutch of adrenaline that induces a feeling of impending doom (in this case, damnation) Such feelings are false, and during her life when not suffering an adrenaline rush, she knows this and relies on her Saviour. 

The Bible teaches us not to be anxious, but any anxious person will tell you that it is a fact that anxiety will come for no apparent reason. My point is that Satan will use this hormone induced attack on our bodies to make us feel guilty, alienate us from feeling close to God, and cause us to be more anxious. We know it is written we shouldn't be anxious- but here we are with anxiety and guilt as our companion. 

We know we should trust God but often it's not so clear cut and defined. It does us no good to be told we are sinning when it is clearly a chemistry problem which manifests itself as anxiety. In our stronger moments, we are aware of the scriptures. One who suffers from anxiety does not need to be told they are willfully sinning. We need people's understanding and compassion. It goes without saying, that we always have that from Jesus. 

We tend to forget that most often sufferers of anxiety and panic have often been in the midst of the most horrendous of stresses and trials, often for years, and despite being faithful and clinging to God, they have a meltdown. Trials include all chronic illness such as fibromyalgia and disabilities. 

It would behove us all to remember to be Christ-like to these suffering Children of God and comfort them, pray for them and encourage them. Those of us who suffer like this are prime candidates for panic attacks and meltdowns.  We should do unto others as we would have them do unto us:  pray for them,  help them back on their feet and never judge them. Anxiety and panic are no respecter of people: but by the Grace of God, go I. 

Mercy.  Grace.  Compassion.  Love.  Prayer.  All are healing balms for the poor one having a meltdown. We need to tell them there is hope and there is healing and that nothing can separate us from God's love.

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

For I am persuaded,  that neither death,  nor life,  nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things  to  come,  nor height,  nor depth,  nor any other creature,  shall be  able to separate us from the love of God which in Christ Jesus our Lord.  Romans 8:38-39

Give us the comfort of Jesus~

I recently saw a post from a Christian woman who blogs about marriage and who believes she is an authority on all things spiritual. Along with this narcissim, she has a very prideful and uncompassionate and judgemental attitude. Plus she will never concede that perhaps, just perhaps, she is wrong.

She was exhorting us to not allow any sin into our lives: gluttony was high up on her list. And whilst gluttony is a sin- (anything taken into excess especially that which is harmful- is a sin)- she proceeded to broadcast her lack of knowledge in weight and health matters, and made the blanket statement that overweight is always due to gluttony and that is therefore sin.

So many chronically ill people commented and her attitude was one of "pipe down you glutton and confess your sin!" Many overweight people- Christians- were upset by her and I join them. I wrote a reply as this woman needs to be made aware that her judgements are not only spiritually wrong but also medically incorrect....

OK. So I am obese. After 3 heart stents, an underactive thyroid that took years to diagnose, fibromyalgia, Scheurrmanns Disease, spinal stenosis, hole in the heart and a torn meniscus in the left knee plus years of Prednisolone due to polymyalgia rheumatica, I don't move around much.

Every single one of the 30 pills I must take daily add to my chronic fatigue and lack of alertness. I eat healthy food and keep to 1200 cals a day. Due to meds, I must eat with them and I cannot fast- but I have tried. To make a simple equation in physics help me lose weight, I would be able to consume a plate of lettuce once a day. Which is unreasonable and unsustainable.

I am very close to God and am under absolutely no conviction that I am either a glutton or a consistent sinner. I am however, absolutely constantly reassured of a God Who loves me as a Father loves His child and I confess I cling to Him in my daily living with chronic illness and consequent obesity.

To have prideful and uncompassionate people act like Jobs' Comforters is no help at all and very unChristlike. Where is grace? Why the judgements? Thank God we have one Judge and Advocate: I thank God it's Jesus.

It is a shame that this woman is so unsympathetic and strident: she speaks a lot of truth regarding marriage, but again with the caustic remarks and prideful attitude one sees in her adored author Debi Pearl, as seen in her horrible book Created to Be A Help Meet.

A Christian teacher should be gentle, not prideful, harsh and downright cruel. There are so many of us who are overweight and who fight it daily. We do not need to be told that we are sinning because of our weight. It is a sad state of affairs when we have the added pain of condemnation from an unlearned individual to contend with as well.

Let us be slow to speak and then to do so in love, just as our Saviour taught us. We need His comfort as we battle our weight and illnesses, not some self righteous cowgirl galloping in on her stallion. Job's comforters are not required- (not that she tries to comfort anyway) Give us the comfort of Jesus!

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

I have heard many such things: miserable comforters are ye all. Job 16:2