Help until He comes

Today was a busy day in that I was organising aged care help for Chris and I ... we arent coping all that well... lots of phone calls that had me on hold for at least an hour each 

After nearly a whole day on the phone, I am happy to report that we were approved for help. Our aged care home package will start in 3-4 weeks. It includes transport, home maintenance, podiatry, and grass cutting. Later on as we get older it will include meals on wheels... but as long as I can cook, we would prefer our own cuisine. 

I am hoping that God takes us Home soon. That is the best thing to dwell on. But meanwhile, while we wait, my house could do with a deep clean, our toenails are feral and we need them properly done. We cant take a bath and we help each other shower but a grip bar and telephone type shower have been promised to us under home maintenance, and that would stop the suffocation feeling of water pouring over our head when we can't breathe at the best of times.. 

We cant drive most times and we will need transport for a personal consultation with our doctor and the help they offer is needed now.  Nothing to do with lack of faith or not watching- but we have to be practical. 

Heart failure is a beast that stalks us both and is a progressive disease. Peripheral neuropathy in our feet and legs is a constant pain that stops sleep.  A physiotherapist may be able to help or offer exercises to alleviate it.. all things that need attention now. 

Including last but not least, changed bed linen that can be done without banging gnarled fingers and hands... and while we look with anticipation and longing to be Home, the daily necessities of life are calling. 

We rely on God to help us and are grateful that He has blessed us with the help we need...until He comes. Our life style is always if the LORD wills.... we consider ourselves blessed that we are eligible for the help that's come our way, until He comes! God willing, it will be soon. But if not, we will be accepting help to keep going until He comes.

 © Glenys Robyn Hicks

" So teach [us] to number our days, that we may apply [our] hearts unto wisdom" Psalm 90:12

The four little tasks of home by Sharon White

                                 

It  is nice to  have a set routine of  work to do at home.   One can  go  about  the day with  a remembrance of  certain housekeeping duties that are necessary for each day.  Then, during the many breaks for rest, or visiting with guests, or a pleasant talk on the telephone, one finds refreshment and courage to go on.  The times of work and the times of rest, done with quiet courage, provide happiness in our homemaking.

1.  There is the breakfast hour, which includes tea-time. First we prepare the meal and set a table.  I often set up a tray- table and sit in the parlour before anyone else is awake.  I am an early riser so I have my tea while the sun is just beginning to rise.  I enjoy this quiet time of resting from the brief bit of morning work.

Later, when the family has their eggs and toast, or fresh baked muffins with fruit, it is time to do the dishes.   We wash the table and the counters and do the sweeping.   All the work of tidying and making things neat are part of the breakfast duties.

2.  Often, during the morning hours, we do the laundry or the dusting and vacuuming. Each day has its special work.  It may be Wednesday is for washing floors. Perhaps Thursday is for cleaning the bathroom.  The mid-morning hours are a good time for many of us to do these special duties of making a home look pretty.

3.  The Lunch hour is such a wonderful time to stop and rest.  We put out a fresh, clean tablecloth.  I love my white-and-teal checkered cloth.  It looks so homey and old fashioned.  We can set up our plates and napkins. We can do this even if we are just serving grilled cheese sandwiches, pickles, and chips!  It makes the lunch - work like a reward when we sit at that pretty table and rest and eat while we enjoy the family.  Next we do the sweeping and the dishes, much like we did in the morning.

4.  The dinner hour is such a precious time in the day.  I often start working on the evening meal at 3 in the afternoon. I work slowly and take lots of breaks. Sometimes I peel potatoes and start getting a little casserole ready to bake.  Other times I might do much of the work for a pan of lasagna. I like to put these pans of prepared food in the refrigerator and then just take them out to bake when it is just about dinner time.  That way I get a great deal of rest between all the work.

Sitting with the family and hearing the blessing (or the prayer before the meal) is such a peaceful experience.  It is lovely to just sit and enjoy dinner at the end of a long day.  Then the work of tidying, doing the dishes, and sweeping the floor happens.  We make everything look neat and pretty. But I do not like to rush.  I do not want to just "get the work over-with." I take my time and go at a steady pace.  The work of cleaning and accomplishing the beautiful work of making a neat home makes me happy.  It also brings peace.

These four tasks of homemaking do not take a great deal of effort.  They may seem simple and ordinary.  They may seem mundane.  But if we dress up in something pretty, wearing an apron, and keeping our hair up in a pretty style, we may find ourselves enjoying the work.  I have an old blue-and-white gingham apron that I love to wear. It is getting old and ragged. I will have to make a new one this coming fall.  I need a fresh supply of lovely aprons to wear as I do the housekeeping.

When we look extra nice as we do our work, we can find joy in the labor.  Doing the little tasks of keeping house, each day, with a feeling of contentment, will bring a true feeling of comfort and happiness to the family.  It will help them feel welcome and loved in a happy and simple home.  by Mrs Sharon White of the Legacy of Home

 “[To be] discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed”. Titus 2:5 ..

Making the most of my spoons

So for the last few days I have been enjoying a respite from fibromyalgia pain. The weather has been lovely and sunny and the warmth has permeated my being and soothed a lot of muscle pain.

I have been decluttering our home and making extra meals to freeze for later on. It has been a novelty and a joy to have spoons to do it.

Aware that it can bring on a flare if I do too much, I have been pacing myself. I do 15 minutes sessions of decluttering with a rest in between. With cooking, I do about half an hour of food prep then take a rest as well.

I am enjoying my new dishwasher too. It certainly makes keeping up with the dishes and keeping my kitchen tidier easier. And that I find, encourages me to cook.

I really don't know how long this respite will last, but I'm grateful each day that I have absence from pain and fatigue.

Until you have a respite, you don't realise how challenging your life is. So for the moment, however brief it may be, I will be making the most of my spoons.

 

Keeping the homefires burning

 

Lately I have had a really long and debilitating fibromyalgia flare. I think it was brought on by stressing about my son who had a large kidney stone removed and was suffering badly with his kidney stent.

With over 50 renal stones and 5 surgeries to remove them, I literally felt his pain. He has been out of work due to his ordeal for 6 weeks and so it has been a worry to him and to me..

My fibromyalgia flare has effected my eyes some days. I have trouble focussing especially when reading and I have had double vision. That has been accompanied with the usual pain and the fatigue is out of this world.

I have found that just running our home to a basic plan has been more than enough for my body and after I do a few household chores, I feel so weak that I almost vomit. I just have to take a nana nap.

The life of a Sacrificial HomeKeeper is not an easy one. But we somehow push through those walls of fatigue and at least keep the homefires burning...

©  Glenys Robyn Hicks  

"I love you LORD my strength!" Psalm 18:1

More than a place to sleep

Recently someone asked why do we make our bed? I gave it some thought as I have recently been making my own bed daily, in spite of regularly going back into it for a nana nap. Here's a few thoughts on why I use my precious spoons to make my bed.

Physically its more comfortable to sleep in. 

Psychologically its more inviting.

It makes the room visually more esthetically pleasing.

The bed's the centrepiece of the room like in a painting. 

It gives the illusion of order and calm.

It uplifts my spirits when I come into my bedroom.

With fibromyalgia, angina and back problems, I make mine but often get back in it. So I remake it.

When I make it, I don't get on my knees as they are broken and I do not do hospital bed mitred corners. I pull up my top sheet, then turn back the minky blankets. With arthritic hands, the only tucks I do are at the bottom of the bed to secure the bedding...

But, being honest, I sometimes let it go when I have a fibro flare- being satified that the sheets and bedding is clean. But the majority of times, my beds are made. 

Beds are more comfortable made up or at least straightened and are more than a place to sleep.

It makes my spoons quiver!

So yesterday we had more family come for Christmas. We had a lovely lunch, feasting on the abundant leftovers from the feast on Christmas Day. 

Because I had pushed myself physically the day before, my fibromyalgia was flaring and my back was spasming because I had been on my feet preparing food for a long time. I was feeling overwhelmed.

I was feeling hospitable, it was just because of pain that the day was on a downer for me personally. I tried my best to be cheerful. We Fibromites and chronically ill people become consumate actors in playing the cheerful game.

My step-daughter was very gracious and helped me make teas and coffees and carve left over ham, and not for the first time, I was very grateful to her.

With 35C temperatures- 95F, I was also very grateful for our air conditioner. The dining area was very comfortable and we passed a pleasant day.

My little 4 year old great-granddaughter Evie came to me and asked me to show her my bedroom. So taking my hand, she led me to my room, looked at the ensuite, and declared, "Nana, I love your house, and I love you too!"  It made my day.

Her declaration of love warms my heart even now as I talk to you. I am sitting here in fibro pain with my two freshly broken purple toes throbbing. (I kicked the corner of the dining table leg, collecting two toes for the price of one.) But the happiness of my little lovely Evie's declaration overshadows even the pain today.

The house is tidy, the washing in the machine and the Christmas tree and decorations are put away. My robotic vacuums have been run today. We are now officially post Christmas.

We placed the tree still decorated into a closet that is empty, and should the LORD tarry, it will be a simple matter to reinstall it next year. Not that I really can imagine another Christmas right now. 

Quite simply, nice as it was, it makes my few remaining spoons quiver! 

It's coming together!

 

As I told you, I have been trying to get my home back after our move, and so I have also been decluttering. I have given away quite a few things that I found were only taking up space without bringing me joy.

It was hard to give away some things that were my mother's but I bit the bullet and did it. The recipient was so happy that it made me feel good to have been able to bless her!

I put into action Sarah's organic cleaning and threw out those clothes I don't like or fit in to any more, as I hung up clean clothes that had been sitting around for too long! I bought some storage boxes and put sorted underwear and night clothes in them.

That did create some dust but I didn't worry as I have a robotic vacuum. I highly recommend to all Sacrificial Home Keepers that they get a robotic vacuum- preferably one that mops as well as vacuums. They are coming down in price but I assure you, they are worth every cent!

Small steps for sure, especially for those who are healthy, but climbing a mountain to us chronically ill. I am inordinately pleased with what I have accomplished so far! It's coming together, here a little, there a little!

Worth every cent!

 

I have enjoyed using my Roomba robotic vacuum so much that I have bought another robotic vacuum that also mops the floors.

Our home has lots of tiles on the floor and it takes a good deal of spoons to keep them clean. These two robotic vacuums saves me on energy and pain.

There's been little energy and a lot of pain these last few weeks. My blood pressure is still high even with me resting more. It's a bit of a puzzle really as emotionally I am good-or as good as someone with constant fibromyalgia pain can be. So I am not stressed.

I am enjoying our new home and it is finally decorated and things unpacked. I have also been decluttering and have given away quite a few things that I found were only taking up space without bringing me joy.

Anyway, I highly recommend all Sacrificial Home Keepers get a robotic vacuum- preferably one that mops as well as vacuums. They are coming down in price but I assure you, they are worth every cent!

Between my nana naps!

 

Today is Saturday morning here. I have had a busy week with doctors appointments and physio for my daughter who is doing really well. 

My son had a possible cancer in his bowels, but the first test was a false alarm and to be honest, it made me anxious. I didn't realise how anxious until he was cleared. 

This son was born with a forceps injury to his eye- it looks normal but he has very little sight in it. He has developed a pterygium or sun damage in his good eye and has surgery next Friday to remove the growth because it is growing across his eye and may interfere with his vision. I will be glad when it's done and his eye has recovered. 

All this has given me the Mother of all Flares. My fibromyalgia is killing me at the moment and I am taking frequent naps to cope with it. I have a few housework chores to do and some folding up of clean washing. I will do it- in between my nana naps! 

For me, it's spoons!

It's Sunday morning here. I have brought in the online groceries and checked them off and put them away. 

I will soon be taking Chris's bloods and doing breakfast. Breakfast will be eggs and bacon and a cup of tea. Lunch will be ham and salad sandwiches. For dinner, I am doing a vegetable intensive beef stew. Fresh fruit for desert.

There's a hamper of clean clothes to fold and then I will be up to date with washing. Later I plan to make some coleslaw, if spoons permit. 

That's about it for today, except for cooking dinner. I don't want to put myself into another fibromyalgia flare or I won't have spoons to help my daughter tomorrow. As I always say: most jugglers juggle balls, for me it's spoons! 

A big part of my life

It's 11.30 Saturday morning here and already we have been to have blood tests, come back and had breakfast and I have done a load of washing, folded clothes and stacked the dishwasher. 

They weren't able to get blood from me today so I have to come back Monday. This in spite of drinking water beforehand. 

Chris is sleeping and I am thinking of having a nana nap as I have no spoons left. So tonight I will be cooking pork chops with mashed potato and salad. I may serve a fruit salad for dessert.

The fibromyalgia is flaring and I am aching all over. I haven't recovered from the move yet. In spite of knowing I could/should do some more around the house, I know that I need to rest or tomorrow will be a repeat of today. Pacing and resting are now a big part of my life since fibro.

You just got to pass it on!

I ran our new irobot roomba vacuum last night. Xena hated it and ran under the bed. Roomba chased her under it and she came out like a scalded cat and bushy tailed. 

Don't worry, she got lots of cuddles afterwards, but it was the funniest thing that's happened in a long time. 

I highly recommend a roomba. It's very easy to operate and manages interchanging between carpets and tiled floors. It's really great when you have cats or dogs as it gets the fur vacuumed up easily. 

Last night ours kept bumping into things as my phone is too old to download the app to schedule and program it. It still did a great job. I am keen to see how much better it does when I update my phone.

We are just staying home this weekend as there's going to be a few days of physios and doctors for Dianne next week. Being oldies, we are bushed! But ya gotta do what ya gotta do! Fibro flare or not!

I am not getting paid for advertising roomba but when you find something that helps with fibromyalgia and other chronic illnesses, you just have to pass it on! 

Stating your name and business

As you know, we have just moved and along with a new home, comes some new things to add to the decor.

Chris and I love this door mat. This verse is one of our favourites and when we saw it we wanted it. It can be personalised to add your family name.

It looks lovely at the front door. We still have pictures to be hung and some flat packs of furniture to make up. The unpacking itself is almost finished.

The plan is to gradually go through room to room and gradually declutter. But this will depend on my spoons. I have another fibromyalgia flare.

But we have been finding that even a concerted effort of 5 minutes at a time followed by a rest and a cup of tea has paid off. Pacing is critical with fibromyalgia and heart failure.

I am in the process of getting an i-Roomba robotic vacuum cleaner to help with the floors. This house is quite large and the passage alone is as long as a cricket pitch...

Neither Chris or I can vacuum these days and I am hoping that the i-Roomba will save on money to employ a helper to come clean the house for me. I will let you know how we go.

Happily, the robotic vac can manage both tiles and carpet without skipping a beat, so it will be able to keep our lovely door mat free of dust bunnies. 

Meant to be noticed, I don't want visitors to our home seeing the mat dirty- not when it's proclaiming our faith and intention of having a holy home. It's all about stating your name and business! 

"It is what it is!"

A friend of mine posted this on her Face Book wall and it was so simple and doable that I wanted to share this with you.

My hands are deformed with arthritis and I have little strength in them. Opening these ring pull cans have always been a challenge to me. 

Those cans that need a can opener are  simply not purchased anymore. I cannot use one as the arthritis restricts movement.

My fibromyalgia is paining me today and I didn't sleep well last night, so I will be cleaning my kitchen and psyching myself up to take a shower. That and cooking meals is all I will be doing today.

Meals will be Jewish Penicillin in my slow cooker.

It's not much to show for the vast amount of spoons I will need today, but as the young ones always say, "It is what it is!"

It is enough

Today  is  Resurrection Sunday  here.  Chris and I took  communion  with  my son  and sister via facetime this morning.  

None of us is able to get to church right now, but we had a very moving and worshipful service at home. 

He is risen! Happy Easter Sunday to those who celebrate!

I am short on spoons due to fibromyalgia flaring so I will just be doing a load of washing and cooking meals today. It is enough! 

 

And a good sleep

So recently we have been told that we are low on magnesium and have been taking magnesium tablets. It is about 10 days now that we have taken them and although my muscles still pain me, both Chris and I have had less calf cramps.

I have noticed a deeper sleep for myself, though Chris still has trouble but also reports a more refreshing sleep when he manages to drop off. He has noticed that he has less restless leg at night. Any help is a blessing.

As a sufferer of fibromyalgia, I welcome anything that helps me hurt less and sleep better. As it's early days of taking the supplement, I live in hope that it will get even better in its' relaxing effects.

I know it is improving my sleep already because I usually cannot get back to sleep if I wake up early and it's getting light. But today, I woke up to the grey dawn and decided to try going back to bed after going to the bathroom. I managed to sleep until 9.50am. 

I was amazed by this, but had to have an inward chuckle as today was the day my cleaning lady comes at 10.30 and I hadn't done anything. I still needed to get dressed, take our bloods, give Chris his insulin injection, feed Xena and then feed us.

Usually I pick up any dirty clothes up off chairs in our rooms, stack the dishwasher, and empty rubbish from the mini rubbish bins around the house, plus check Xena's tray is clean before she comes. I don't want her wasting her time on stuff I can do- I want her to focus on what I can't do like washing the floors and cleaning the bathroom.

But today, I managed to tidy up so that the cleaner could just clean- but we still were eating breakfast when she arrived. So because we were late through sleeping in, she was surprised to see us still at the island bench, eating. 

It all worked out well and I am hoping that the magnesium's effect continues. Even if it's ten pills a morning now for us both to take. As long as they make our bodies think we are healthier than we are, it's all for a good cause. And a good sleep.

This too will pass

 

It's been nearly a week without spoons. I have absolutely no energy to speak of and have just been focussing on keeping the clothes washed, kitchen clean and cooking.

I suppose it's my fault. With some recent spoons, I probably overdid it and hence the Flare of Flares. It's sort of predictable with fibromyalgia. But I was hoping to break out of the pain/fatigue cycle. I haven't.

 

The doctor has become concerned about my blood pressure being high 160/90 and has been trying to get me to give myself a once a week injection of a drug that's supposed to help me lose weight as well as keep the sugars low. I don't want it.

My feelings are that once you inject something, you have to put up with any side-effects for another week, unlike oral tablets that you have some control over. You can stop taking them: not so with injections. Yes, you can stop using them but the chemical is in your system for a week.

I am sick enough with the antibiotics I am taking for suspected cellulitis in my leg. They are very rugged and have given me thrush as well. But I need to finish the course to heal my leg.

So because I have an infection, I am listening to my body and taking a nana nap if I need it. And I don't feel guilty for napping.

I am trying to keep upbeat and not stress too much. It's hard for me as Chris is suffering with his heart failure as well.

I know better days must come and that's why I chose the picture above. With prayer and leaning on the LORD, this phrase often comes to mind:  "this too will pass" and it will- eventually. 

You just don't know when it will break.

 

Over the last week I have been enjoying a respite from fibromyalgia pain and fatigue. I don't know why it happened, but of course I am glad it did.

During that time I have been busy cooking meals in advance for the next time I have the inevitable flare. It has been working out really well.

I have been carefully pacing myself, allowing 15 minutes of decluttering then resting. Emotionally, it's very satisfying.

Well, I woke up this Sunday morning and have had an unwelcome guest: you guessed it: another fibromyalgia flare. So I guess that I overdid it..So today I will be reaping the benefits of preparing some meals in advance. 

Conversely, though suffering physically, I am not depressed by this: I knew my respite wouldn't last forever. But oh how wonderful it was to have some spoons and to be able to go a whole day without a nana nap!

We Fibromites in regards to spoons and flares, are definitely babies in cradles swinging from the tree tops. We know that at any time the bough can break and we will come tumbling down. 

But it's best if we just learn to go with the flow and try to enjoy the respite: the bough might not break for ages, but you never do know.

It's gonna be a PJ's day.

 

The rain is pouring down but it's not cold just pleasantly warm after the last few days of summer heat. Xena is still asleep on my bed.

Chris is watching TV and I have got the breakfast dishes soaking in hot soapy water. The house is tidy and cosy. Life is good.

I woke up early and left Chris to sleep. I heard the birds calling each other and watched as my beloved Kingfishers came down searching for some left over sausage among the rice dish I put out for them last night.

Carefully opening the sliding door that opens onto the decking where they congregate waiting for me to feed them, they sat only inches away from me. Gradually they are coming closer to feeding from my hand. 

The washing machine is churning away at the load of clothes I am washing. I try to do a load a day so as not to use up all my spoons in one hit, folding them and putting them away. 

People with fibromyalgia would understand the need to pace oneself in order to achieve some completion of household tasks. There's so much job satisfaction in even doing one load of washing and putting it away. 

I have some steak thawing for dinner tonight. I am planning on cooking a vegetable intensive beef stew.

With the cooler weather and rain, the menu begs for a stew...

I still haven't changed out of my pajamas and it's 1pm but I don't really care. We aren't going anywhere and I am feeling pretty laid back and a tad achy. It's the change in weather.

It was a pretty slow but pleasant morning with Chris making me some breakfast and a cup of tea. The panadol is kicking in helping me with the aches and pains of fibromyalgia that's reacting to the weather change, but I am glad to report that it's not a fibro flare per se.

So in spite of aches and pains, I am feeling pretty good today, but even so, it's gonna be a PJ's day. 

They're silently waiting for me

Anyone who follows this blog knows that I struggle with washing the dishes. It is a battle that is fought and lost on two fronts: emotional and physical.

The emotional part is owing to the fact that I don't have a dishwasher and the dishes multiply like rabbits and are a continual eye sore on the side of the sink. 

In spite of cleaning them up and being rewarded by not only an empty sink and benches and of course, clean dishes- I find the complete futility of feeling done with them is disheartening.

A terrible procrastinator, I promise myself that I will keep up with them, but illness laughs as it assails me with yet another flare, and they remain on the bench mocking me for being  defeated yet again.

So here comes the other side of this domestic dilemma: being completely out of spoons and suffering from broken knees and collapsing spine. I simply cannot stand.

And of course that horridly wicked ruler, Fibromyalgia ensures that I am in an almost constant flare, and it is the cherry on the top of my cocktail of pain. So not only is my physical health attacked, but also my mental health. It's depressing.

I know I could ask Chris for help, but he has heart failure and battles his own health issues. It has always been me who washes the dishes, and then he will usually come and dry them and put them away. I am grateful.

Until I can gather some spoons I will sit and wait for my Tramadol to work. I plan to clear the dishes up, cook some steak and vegetables for dinner tonight and rest. That's the plan. Meanwhile, they're silently waiting for me.