Morning Cuppas With Glenys : Divine Order

Showing posts with label Divine Order. Show all posts

Choose the best

When reading the story of Mary and Martha in Luke 10:40, many people think that Jesus was rebuking Martha in a negative way. But I don't believe this is so. He in fact, was liberating her from her perfectionism and showing her that there is more to life than just the mundane.

You may recall that Martha was busy serving and preparing the evening meal, whereas Mary was simply enjoying listening to Jesus. Martha was doing an important job, as do we wives and mothers when we manage our households and serve our families. We all know that preparing three meals a day, washing and ironing, cleaning and tidying the house, as well as caring for those of our household- and even extended households sometimes, is mundane. But no one would suggest it wasn't important. So Jesus wasn't undermining its' importance, but He was saying that putting the things of the LORD first is a better way.....

Have you ever thought about how we can so easily get too involved with the practical aspects and lose out on the social and spiritual side? I often plan to make time for Bible reading, or playing with my grandchildren or spending time with Chris, only to find that I have found something else to do. I need to prioritise my life. So, we must look at the Titus 2 order of priorities- love God, love your husband, love your children, then be a worker at home! This layout of priorities also emphasises the importance that our husbands be our first priority after God! That means my children are second to the needs of my husband. To clarify- that does not mean if a child is crying or needs something that we don't attend to them. It means we defer to our husband and put his wishes before our children's.

Often times we get so busy serving our husbands and children that we overlook enjoying them! Take time to enjoy the other important things in life, your children: they will grow up fast, and this season will be short! Leave the household chores that aren’t urgent to the childrens’ nap times, and spend time enjoying them while they are awake! Make time for your husband. He will be happier for it, you will feel more fulfilled and your children will have a happier home life because you have a good marriage!

And remember to spend time with God, for He is our firm foundation. God wants us to enjoy our life. Let us then be balanced and live under His Umbrella of Protection. For in Gods' Divine Order, we will find the balance we need for the other important things.We need to tend to the mundane things like housework, but we see that Jesus says it's important to tend to our spirit too. So choose the best!

But Martha was cumbered about much serving, and came to him, and said, Lord, dost thou not care that my sister hath left me to serve alone? bid her therefore that she help me. Luke 10:40

Tending to our spirit

We all know that preparing three meals a day, washing and ironing, cleaning and tidying the house, as well as caring for those of our household- and even extended households sometimes, is mundane. But no one would suggest it wasn't important. So Jesus wasn't undermining its' importance, but He was saying that putting the things of the LORD first is a better way.....

So, we must look at the Titus 2 order of priorities- love God, love your husband, love your children, then be a worker at home! This layout of priorities also emphasises the importance that our husbands be our first priority after God! That means my children are second to the needs of my husband. To clarify- that does not mean if a child is crying or needs something that we don't attend to them. It means we defer to our husband and put his wishes before our children's. Children do not run the household- you do!

Often times we get so busy serving our husbands and children that we overlook enjoying them! Take time to enjoy the other important things in life, your children: they will grow up fast, and this season will be short! Leave the household chores that aren’t urgent to the children's nap times, and spend time enjoying them while they are awake! Make time for your husband. He will be happier for it, you will feel more fulfilled and your children will have a happier home life because you have a good marriage!

But Martha was cumbered about much serving, and came to him, and said, Lord, dost thou not care that my sister hath left me to serve alone? bid her therefore that she help me. Luke 10:40

Let him lead

God created man directly under Him with a wife equal in value but in submission to her husband. Where there are two heads in a marriage, wherein the man is not allowed to be responsible under God for his decisions, there is the distinct possibility that he will feel emasculated.

Submission is not understood. Mainly because we think that our men will take advantage of us and rule the roost without any desire to know how we feel or think about something.

A man who loves his wife will consult with her and value her insight and will then make a decision that they are both in agreement with. If not, he is out of line in the Divine Order.

We talk things through, evaluate the best way to go then we allow our husband to make the final decision. He is responsible under God for his decisions, ours is to pray and support him.

God has decreed that we wives allow our husbands to lead. He is to be head of our home, even if he is unsaved. He is to treated with respect! As long as our husband is not asking us to sin, he is to be obeyed.

In no way are we meant to be treated as doormats. That is not what God wants in a Christian marriage either. We are equal to our husband yet we have distinctly separate roles. These roles are in keeping with how we are created, and they actually enhance our femininity whilst bolstering our husband's masculinity.

If we submit to our husband, we will be staying within God's Umbrella of Protection in the Divine Order.

A man yearns to be respected, a woman yearns to be loved. If we emasculate our husband by usurping his God-given role, he will resent us. Respect will bring out his better qualities, and he will feel that he can love a woman who highly regards him.

We love God, therefore we submit to our husband because of that love. Let him lead.

For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so [let] the wives [be] to their own husbands in every thing. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. Ephesians 5:23-30

Tending to our spirit.

But Martha was cumbered about much serving, and came to him, and said, Lord, dost thou not care that my sister hath left me to serve alone? bid her therefore that she help me. Luke 10:40

Feminism has burst our bubble

When I was a young woman feminism was just rearing its ugly head. It swept through womankind in the Western world and excited them as they plowed through piles of ironing and household chores. It promised liberation from drudgery and new freedom in the world outside the home.

No longer was it acceptable to be a home maker, serving our husband and family, but it denigrated us women, making us appear as mindless creatures who couldn't think for ourselves. We women, happy to bear and raise our children, were despised and even pitied.

It became easier to have an abortion and with the advent of The Pill, the reproductive cycle of womankind was controlled. Fornication, adultery and promiscuity became the norm with women often becoming the more sexually aggressive of the sexes. With these changes and with the ensuing disrespect for their husbands, no fault divorce was made law and many many marriages failed.

Young girls were not shown home making skills but were taught to study hard and go to university and have a career. Many found to their dismay later in life, that they didn't know how to run a home or cook. The newest generation became latch key children and often came home to an empty house.

Feminism was touted as a woman's right, along with having a career and not having children later on if they even married. And like many feminists, many found that by the time they were ready for children, that they were unable to conceive.

Feminism for the most part, has been successful. The woman who longs to be a wife and mother and not work outside the home is treated contemptuously by society in general, even in church circles. She often is made to feel inferior every time the question is asked as to what she does for a living. Apparently, being a woman who works hard in her home is nothing warranting praise.

For the woman who wants to have a lot of children, there is nothing but raised eyebrows and smart comments when they find out another child is expected. It is a common thing today to be ousted from society because one does not follow the world's way but delights in being a Proverbs 31 wife.

However, there is now a draw back to feminism, with many women wanting to be stay at home wives and mothers, but such is the thrust of feminism that many husbands do not want their wives to give up work. Women are therefore stuck in the rut that feminism has created for them.

Pregnancy is often something that women are made to curtail or postpone because of their career, and the longing to have a child is often suppressed with a great burden of guilt to boot.

Feminism goes against God's Divine Order and His plan for biblical womanhood. It has done a lot of harm to women, marriage and families and has made women ill from trying to keep it all together.

Far from the freedom that they strove for, feminism has created a bondage for women and actually limits their potential. There is no way back for society generally and there's no pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Feminism has burst our bubble.

Isaiah 3:11-13 Woe unto the wicked! it shall be ill with him: for the reward of his hands shall be given him. As for my people, children are their oppressors, and women rule over them. O my people, they which lead thee cause thee to err, and destroy the way of thy paths. The LORD standeth up to plead, and standeth to judge the people.

The fairy godmother's gotten old!

Wouldn’t it be nice to have a fairy godmother who waved her magic wand and transformed our homes into pristine havens that required no upkeep from us? Then we could do that which we really loved to do without feeling at all guilty.

Some of us tend to live our lives sipping coffee amidst dirty laundry and dust and mess, as if we are expecting her arrival anytime- ready to bail us out of our mess at the flick of a wrist. The family is unhappy with us and we are overwhelmed with chores that have banked up. And there is more bad news- the fairy godmother’s not coming! Well, she might if we are able to afford a maid, but for the majority of us, a maid is a luxury we can’t afford. We are IT!

Over the years, I have found that I have procrastinated about housework so much that I have spent more time planning how to simplify it, organise it and pardon the pun- sanitise it, than if I had just rolled up my sleeves and got on with it. It would have been done sooner and I would have been able to enjoy my leisure time more than I did with my parrot on the shoulder telling me that the work still hadn’t been done! Wisdom through life experience and hindsight has taught me to do that which I don’t enjoy first then relax. It is almost impossible to relax when you have chores that are calling out your name!

God has called us to be domestic- to be the keepers of our home. Whilst it is important that we don’t eat the bread of idleness, I don’t think that He intends us to have no other pursuits in life other than housework. There has to be a balance. The woman who alphabetises her spices and has cupboards that are washed out every week is as unbalanced as the woman who can’t find a clean shirt for her husband or a clean cup to drink from.

I believe the Christian woman has to ensure that her home is clean, her family’s clothes are washed and ironed and that meals are on time and nutritious. She doesn’t have to fret that her home is not like Home Beautiful- but her home should be welcoming to her friends and nurturing to her family. That’s what Home is all about.

If the home is reasonably clean and her husband is contented and her children happy, then I feel that is all that is required of her. It takes effort, discipline and diligence to see that these things are attended to, and it is the wife’s task, for she is Keeper of The Home.

The Christian wife sets the temper of the home and it is her godly responsibility to be domestic. It is her calling and hers alone- she must look after her home with or without help and sick or not, for unfortunately, the fairy godmother’s gotten old and she's not coming!

“He that is faithful in that which is least is faithful also in much: and he that is unjust in the least is unjust also in much.” Luke 16:10

Don't step out from under God's umbrella

A book I have just finished reading again after many years is “You Can Be The Wife Of A Happy Husband” by Darian B Cooper. In one of her chapters she tells of God’s Umbrella of protection through His Divine Order.In a world where we see the havoc that comes from stepping out of the umbrella of God’s protection, it would serve us well to reassess just what the Divine Order of God’s Protection is. Darian has illustrated the Divine Order in the diagram above.

The illustration is self-explanatory really. In my own life, I have found that when this order wasn’t followed, my life would be out of kilter. I remember the times when I was working outside of the home, that trying to keep the home going as normal, mother my children and be available to my husband at all times produced stress in me that often would end up in illness. I was over committed and fatigued.

God brought me full circle to being a stay at home mother and enjoying it by having me walk through some very rocky valleys. I was hospitalised for weeks at a time during which I was shown how much I did appreciate my home and miss being with my family. A bout of glandular fever which lasted for 6 months, brought home to me that my job was creating a lot of stress that God did not require me to carry. And my children were not being cared for properly by a woman I paid a lot of money to, for before and after school care.

About this time, I was being discipled by a lovely group of Titus 2 women who were the most contented and fulfilled women I had ever met. Through all of these experiences, God showed me that the Divine Order is the best. These women taught me about our priorities as godly women. And I am blessed today to have had the privilege of being a stay at home mother for most of my children’s formative years. I am so grateful to God and to those women.

When a woman places herself under the protection of God’s Umbrella of Divine Order, she not only finds fulfilment as a wife, mother and homemaker, but she allows her husband to become the head of his home- the position given him by God in His wisdom. By allowing her husband to lead, she is strengthening her marriage and home and creating strong bonds to develop between not only her children to their father, but herself and her husband. Where a marriage is strong, there is every chance that godly children will be raised.

And where there is chronic illness, staying under God's Umbrella actually shelters us from trying to take on more than He intends us to have. He knows we are stretched to the limit already and He intends to shelter us from unnecessary burdens we weren't meant to bear.

God has provided the blueprint for a successful marriage and family. It is we who mess things up when we live outside of that blueprint by coming out from under the Umbrella of God’s protection. I urge you ladies, to rethink your life and check if you are living under the protection of the LORD. If not, it would be to your eternal advantage to take measures to step back under His protection and allow God to protect you and your family.

God provides protection for your husband too when he is under His Umbrella of Protection. In providing for you and the family, and despite perhaps being an unbeliever, he is still to be respected as the head of the home. But even so, he is to be in submission to God. This is God’s Divine Order. Many a family has come to ruin because a husband has allowed a wife to usurp his God-given authority as head of the home, and forced his wife to take on the role of leader- a position that God did not intend her to have to take.

We all know of marriages that have suffered because the wife has usurped her husband’s role and has decided to lead. It is often a cause for divorce at the most and the husband’s dissatisfaction at the least. And in this day and age particularly, we often see children ruling the home with demands, petulant displays of temper and tantrums, excessive shouting and fighting, argumentativeness, surliness and disobedience. This is another case of God’s Divine Order being breached- and the family suffer the consequences. Children come under the parents in the Divine Order.

Seeing the trouble that breaching the Divine Order makes for us, we would be wise indeed to stop and reflect just where we are in our own life- and if we find we have come out from under God’s Umbrella of protection for us, we would be prudent in getting back into order so that God can bless us and lighten our daily cares.

I sincerely praise God for making His ways known to us so that we and our loved ones may be blessed as we live under His protection and love.

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

He hath shewed thee, O man, what [is] good; and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God? Micah 6:8

God's plan for us is amazing!

As you probably know, I write for some Christian Sites as well as my blog, and I have been amazed at the way it has shown me that God's plan for our lives is the right one. His ways are always right.

I have always sought to live my life according to God's Word, and I have tried to encourage other Christian women in their walk. Over the five years that I have written of God's wonderful plan for us as wives, mothers and homemakers, I have been impressed with how the 5 areas of priority in our lives overlap so much that at times I have had to categorise them by adding all the 5 areas to each post. Let me explain.

Just a quick recap of the five areas of service for the Christian woman and wife in order of priority:

God
Husband
Children
Home
Church

We must serve God and have Him first in our life.

"He hath shewed thee, O man, what [is] good; and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God?" Micah 6:8

Because everything is spiritual in our life, I have discovered that when we serve our husbands, we are serving Christ.

" Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as is fit in the Lord " Colossians 3:18 "For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy" 1 Corinthians 7:14

When we look after our home, we are serving God, our husband and our children.

"I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully." 1 Timothy 5:14

Serving in church or serving in God's Name is important but should not come before all the other 4 priorities are in order.

" (widows) well reported of for good works; if she have brought up children, if she have lodged strangers, if she have washed the saints' feet, if she have relieved the afflicted, if she have diligently followed every good work" 1 Timothy 5:10

I have found that often I cannot place a post under just one category because it is so closely correlated to the other categories of service. This is because everything in our lives is spiritual.

When we consider the umbrella of God's protection as well, we can see that God's plan for our lives is amazing. We have everything here to guide us as wives, mothers and homemakers. We can be sure that we are living our lives in a way that is pleasing to God and in keeping with His Word. It is not only comforting to know that God's Word guides us in our daily living, but it is also amazing that we can know with a certainty that God not only approves of us being wives, mothers and homemakers, but that He calls most of us to be that!

If God has called us to be a wife with all that entails, then let us rejoice in His plan for our life. In doing so, we can be partners with God in His greatest creation: people who will love Him and live for eternity with Him! And we will live an abundant life full of blessings as Christ has promised.

© Glenys Robyn Hicks