I read this and thought not only would it be helpful for us older sisters, but also for us
Sacrificial HomeKeepers especially those of us who suffer with fibromyalgia.
There are many websites that have detailed instructions teaching young women how to clean and organize their homes. However, I haven't been able to find much on teaching older women how to adjust to not being able to stay on a routine cleaning schedule due to health problems, yet keep a clean home.
This article can also apply to younger, healthier women too because of the unexpected occurrences that do happen in all our lives.
One thing you need to know about me is that I've always had the problem of perfectionism, which I have learned to control in recent years. You may be wondering why I consider perfectionism as a problem. For most people with this characteristic, they are uptight and easily upset when things don't go as planned. The least little thing that goes wrong immediately puts them in a bad mood. Why? Because they have lost control of the situation.
I have had to ask the Lord on many occasions to help me adjust my attitude and He has been faithful in doing so. I am MUCH more relaxed than I use to be and give the Lord all the credit because I don't think it is something you can change on your own. Oh, I occasionally will fall into my old way of thinking at times, but quickly realize that old enemy and put it away.
As we age, we usually end up with a few health problems along the way and we also tend to move a bit slower, thus taking longer to do one chore. It can be very frustrating to those who have always tried to keep a clean and tidy home. Maybe bending or stooping is causing you pain at times or you just can't seem to do as much in one day.
* My number one recommendation is to RELAX!!!!! I don't mean to sit all day eating bon-bons and watching soap operas, but relax your attitude.
If you are like most women, you dread another woman coming into your home if it isn't absolutely and perfectly clean and tidy. We are always apologizing for the way the house looks when most of the time, it is just fine.
Your children are grown and maybe already left the nest, so it is just you and your husband. This alone will help you because there are now only two to make a mess. Yet, the house still needs tender, loving care.
* Clutter in your home can appear to others as uncleanliness, so make sure to put things back where they belong and keep your home as clutter-free as possible. A tidy home will appear clean even when there are a few dust bunnies around. Maybe it's time to get rid of some things you no longer really need. Maybe that collection doesn't have the same appeal or meaning to you as it once did. Ask your children if they are interested in having it. If not, why not donate it or have a garage sale? The less "things" you have, the less dusting. Take a picture of it and put in a memory scrapbook! Then be happy you have less dusting to do.
* Your laundry loads will be greatly diminished when it is just the two of you. I have found that on days my back is acting up, I can sometimes still accomplish doing the laundry by having a low stool by the dryer to sit on. That way I can reach into the dryer without bending over and sit there folding each item. My husband and daughter frown on me doing anything when my back is bothering me and they say, "Why didn't you call me to do that?!!!!" Well, I'm the type of person that if I can find a way to do something myself, I'll do it. Asking for help is my last resort.
* Depending on your ailment, sweeping, mopping, and vacuuming can be difficult along with cleaning the tub/shower. May I suggest to look at alternative cleaning equipment? A couple of years ago my daughter gave me a Swiffer floor vac and Swiffer wet jet. These two items have been a tremendous help to me. They are VERY lightweight and easy to use. Of course these are to be used on hard floor surfaces only. I read once where a woman used an old-fashioned mop to clean her tub and shower. Prevented her from having to bend over. If you are completely unable to do these tasks and your husband isn't able to do them either, why not consider asking one of your children if they have time once a week to do this for you? Or maybe someone from your church? I would recommend that you try to get someone you know very well.
* If you have clothes and shoes in your closet that you haven't worn in a long time, get rid of them. Same thing with bed linens. Get rid of excess. It's that much less to collect dust or mold. Haven't you ever noticed the "old person" odor when you walk into someone's home? Just because you are getting older doesn't mean you should quit caring for your home and yourself. Be sure to bathe/shower daily. Don't forget to wash your hair! Get in the habit of laundering small loads instead of letting clothes and damp towels set around until you have a big load to wash. At least once a year, ask a strong person you know to come in and move furniture for you so that you can clean behind those items. Don't forget to take care of those curtains! Wash and dry or have them dry cleaned.
What I am still trying to get through my thick skull is to pace myself on the good days. Give myself less tasks to complete and to take frequent breaks. It is difficult to change our habits, but it can be done. I am having to break a lifelong habit of "Get all your work done and then you can rest."
A typical day for me goes like this:
Before getting out of bed, I thank the Lord for the day and for my family and ask Him to guide each of us in all we say and do that day.
Then it's time to get up, get dressed, and have a cup of hot tea with honey (sometimes I treat myself to a cup of coffee, black only) and watch the news with Hubby while waking up. Then it's time to prepare something for breakfast.
No, I do not wear heels around the house. It's socks and slippers during cold weather and sandals during hot weather. I don't wear a head covering, but I do like wearing an apron.
After breakfast I clean up the kitchen and then sit down to check email and decide what I'm going to try and accomplish that day. Depending on what is to be done, I remind myself that if it is going to take longer than 15-30 minutes, I MUST take a break. This is usually when I'll do a blog post or visit a few blogs and check emails again.
Since my Hubby is retired on disability, we have our lunch together around noon each day. If I'm having a good day, I will try to accomplish another task after lunch. If not, then I keep my hands busy. I'll do...knit or crochet.
As a homemaker, we all would love our husband and children to really take notice of what we do. Sometimes we feel we are taken for granted and wonder, "Is my family really grateful for the things I do around here?" You all KNOW what I'm saying. We don't expect them to come home everyday and gush over how clean the house looks, but every once in a while it's nice for one of them to thank us for what we do. Well, this feeling DOES happen to the man of the house. Here's what happened:
I've not been able to vacuum lately and my daughter has been busy and gone a lot. Hubby and I both have been having back troubles, but last Friday I was feeling a bit better and told him I had to get out of the house for a while. I went shopping.
Later in the afternoon, he said, "Did you notice I vacuumed?"
I looked down and said with a grin, "When did you do that?"
"While you were gone to town. You know when I vacuum, it really needs it!"
Then he said that he was going to wait and see if I noticed that he had vacuumed, but couldn't stand to wait any longer and had to tell me what he did. LOL! So, I thanked him. :) Written by Sharon from Sharon's Roses blog which has been deleted now...
That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children. To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. Titus 2:4-5
