The King was in his counting house

There is an old rhyme that jokingly says, "What's yours is mine and what's mine's my own!"  It usually refers to money more than possessions.  Chris often says that to me when I ask him for some money!

We are able to laugh about it because nothing is further from the truth in our marriage. We don't have his and her money.... all monies that come into the house belong to us both.  We are a team in everything in life, including money.

Because we share everything in life, we also share how we have spent our money... which isn't often because most times before we spend, we discuss it..  If we have been separated during the day, we will come home and work out our finances together.

Ever since our marriage nearly 22 years ago, we have used Microsoft Money 2000, a computer software package that we work out our budget on and we keep track of our expenses and income.  Because I am more computer savvy than Chris and am used to working out finances as part of my previous job positions, he allows me control of our finances.

When I say control, I do not mean secrecy, or spending unwisely. I mean budgeting,  keeping an account of expenses and bills  and so forth.  There is no control of how he spends money in the sense that I dole out X amount of money to him and no more...No, we are a partnership and as such we are accountable one to the other regarding what we have done with our money. 

Each evening for example, I will check our bank account, check the amount of money in my purse and Chris' wallet and work out the money... If Chris has spent some money, he tells me how much and on what, and I just do an adjustment in the ledger...  I don't fuss over what it was as I trust Chris to have discussed with  me if we are going to buy anything if it is a large purchase.

Likewise, if I need to buy something for a birthday, or some clothes or something on ebay, I will always ask him first... most times if I say that is affordable, he will agree.  I never have to feel guilty over any purchases. He trusts me implicitly as well.

Every pay fortnight, I work out the bills and then Chris sits down at the computer with me and we discuss which ones we will pay... sometimes my plans in the Money Program are changed around if Chris thinks we will be over committed and we will rearrange things...

Money is not an issue with us because we see that we use it wisely and jointly.  It never is allowed to come between us in causing arguments and strife.  We know that money can cause problems in some marriages and we don't want it to be one in ours...

I received a little money from my Uncles' inheritance when we were first married.  We bought our first home with that money as a deposit... I wanted that money to be something that Chris could benefit from as well as me..

There have been a few people known to us who have his and her money and who even have secreted some away in case the marriage goes belly up... we never want anything like this in our marriage...

Sometimes if I have managed to be frugal, I will stay out in the kitchen, and let Chris get a surprise and see for himself... it is a great joy to me to please him like this... it kind of reminds me of the King in the counting house, counting all his money...I do love to see my frugality pay off...

Money  problems are listed in second place to sexual problems and infidelity, so money should have its rightful place in your marriage... don't let it- no matter how much or how little,  become a stumbling block for you both but share in its management together!

© Glenys Robyn Hicks

The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. Proverbs 31:11