Be blessed in your calling.
An unending story
It is said a mother will raise a child for 18 years or so. What is not told you is that with each child, a mother’s heart is fragmented and not only will she give that child a Life Story at birth, but she will also give it her heart forever. Throughout the rest of her life she will be her child’s biggest influence, inscribing values and skills in its Life’s Book.
Every Page of that child’s life will be scrutinized and lived through. Every word, every full-stop measured in feeding progress, weight gain, colic and diaper changes. Every sentence will be measured in her child holding up its head, smiling, grasping and focusing. Each early Chapter will read as accomplishments in teething, crawling, sitting unsupported, first words and walking.
Shortly, a mother will become an avid Reader of the Book of her child’s life and will pore through it with rapt attention. She will often re-read the previous Chapters, seeking reasons for the present Story unfolding in the most recent Page of her child’s sojourn through life. Quite often this will be a fruitless exercise as she cannot re-write the Chapters. However, she will certainly be able to enhance the outcome of future Chapters by passing on her foresight and life skills to her child.
As the Reader and not the Writer of this Book, the mother will find that she becomes absorbed in every Chapter as it unfolds. Often against her will, she will find that she lives every hurt and disappointment, every heart ache, every pain and illness as if it were her own Life’s Story. And often, being a loving mother, she will wish that the sad Chapter was her own and not her child’s….but she is only the Reader.
Every accomplishment, victory, honour or triumph will become personal as a mother reads and lives her child’s Story. Indeed many mothers will find kudos in their children’s unfolding Life Story, especially if that child is successful. However, successful or not, a mother will still remain a loyal and enthusiastic Reader.
It is not unheard of for a mother to question the Writer of this Book whilst at the same time yearning for the Writer’s direction. But try as she might to become the Writer, this is a Book that she cannot write. She can and should, enquire of the Writer for guidance but in doing so, she must accept that the Editor’s decision is final.
It is interesting to note that just as a mother thinks she may be coming to the end of this Read, that she will find there is a Sequel which is just as compelling as the original. This comes in the form of grandchildren. After one glance at the Prologue, she will find herself giving yet more of her heart as her mind relives the first chapter of her own child’s Life Story.
With shaking hands and teary eyes, she will scan the Page eagerly, knowing that she will be a reader of this new child’s Life Story for many chapters to come. And she will undoubtedly thank the Writer as she lovingly fingers the new Page.
© Glenys Robyn Hicks
He maketh the barren woman to keep house, [and to be] a joyful mother of children. Praise ye the LORD. Psalm 113:9 |
Don't be afraid to train your children
Some of us don't train our children because we are too lazy- it is always easier to just let them go- it takes too much effort to harness them and direct them in the right direction. Some of us do a half-hearted training of our children- because they bug us, we make them toe the line! I suppose that is better than no training at all.
What are the consequences of us not training our children? At the very most rebellious young adults who have no respect for authority- yours or anyone else's. At the very least, young adults who cannot restrain themselves or their moods and who have no respect for property or other people's feelings. Definitely on both counts, we will have bred unhappy young adults.
A lot of mothers are so afraid of harming their children's psyche that they become the child's servant eventually, doting on them and spoiling them until they are insufferable to bear. Mothers, you cannot be your child's best buddy or friend. You have to train your child well and be a mother who is not afraid to enforce her God-given authority as Mother. Your children will respect you for it- they certainly won't respect you for trying to be their friend.
If we don't train our children well we are asking for rottenness to come into their character. A mother who trains and disciplines her children in a loving way will never lose her children's respect or love. Even from early childhood we intuitively know that Mother is our teacher and protector. We may not verbalise it as children but we all know we need a Mother's input in our formative years. However we train our children we can be assured that the results will reach into eternity.
© Glenys Robyn Hicks
'Train up our child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it." Proverbs 22:6
Backslidden children: God gently leads them back.
As mothers and grandmothers, we often feel like failures when our children stop following the LORD and are backslidden. In spite of training our children and teaching them about the LORD, they seem to be departing from The Way and it can send us into a panic.
I can understand how you can feel a failure, but your children have to make certain decisions for themselves as they grow up. Walking the path of faith is a deeply personal daily choice. We cannot make them believe nor can we save them.
The five children I bought up (from ages 49-43 plus a grandchild now 29) have been brought up in the faith. My own children made a confession of faith when young and were all baptised by immersion. Two of them are now living for the LORD and two of them are backslidden but still consider themselves believers. My first grandchildren is agnostic, almost a believer.
All we can do in spite of outward appearances is keep praying for God to change them. We as loving mothers or grandmothers don't know what work God is doing in their heart. We know that the Holy Spirit convicts us of sin, and we have to allow Him to do the work. Often trying to be the Holy Spirit just causes rebellion and hurt feelings and we just get in His way.
There was a stage I thought that none of them believed, but praise God, what was taught them from their youth has resurfaced. So I encourage you not to blame yourself either and to keep praying and believing that your prodigals or backsliders will walk in The Way. God often meets them in the wilderness and gently leads them back on the Straight Path..
© Glenys Robyn Hicks
The soul that sinneth, it shall die. The son shall not bear the iniquity of the father, neither shall the father bear the iniquity of the son: the righteousness of the righteous shall be upon him, and the wickedness of the wicked shall be upon him. Ezekiel 18:20
Go forth and multiply
The cruelest blow
At least I can hold my head up that I've done my best. God sees. He knows I gave myself exclusively to my children and grandchildren. But they made choices that sadly do not include me in their life.
Thank God we aren't accountable for the actions of our kids and grandchildren. I will pray that there's a resolution for myself and any other Sisters who visit here with broken family ties and estranged children and grandchildren.
Loving them with your whole heart and losing them to indifference and disdain is the cruelest blow.
Until the indignation be overpast
- Let us make sure we keep our homes clean and aired.
- Let us try to stay to a routine that gives us time to teach our children.
- Let us remember that our children will be picking up and hearing fearful information, so let us be particularly loving with them.
- Let us make meals that not only fill our family's stomach, but nourish them. Give them something to look forward to at meal times.
- Let us be loving with our husband- chances are he has worries about employment and like you, is concerned about how to stretch the finances and keep the roof over your head and food on the table.
- Let us try to avoid speaking constantly about the ills of this current state of the world in front of the children. They may be young, but they will take in a lot of fear. If the parents are afraid, then for them, it is the end of the world.
- Let us limit watching the news as this is bound to effect everyone. Limit news to finding out directly what you need to know and turn it off.
- Let us watch uplifting videos, especially with our children and let's play with them. Make a cubby house and let your children be the Mum and you the child. Use your imagination and delight them.
- Let us put our little ones into the bath and sit alongside them, singing songs and telling stories and blowing bubbles with them.
- Let us have a sense of calm and peace in our home, for everyone to enjoy.
- Let us be particularly attentive and available to our spouse and fan the flames of romance. It works wonders for a marriage.
- Let us sit at table and teach the little ones etiquette, and have the table set nicely to make it a time of pleasure and unity.
- Let us continue with a daily nightly bedtime routine for the children and keep regular sleeping hours.
- Let us pray with our children at night as they go to bed, allowing them to know that God loves them, watches out for them and calls all the stars by name. Invite discussion of any worries so that they can be reassured and sleep better.
- Let us keep up with our own appearance and hygiene, for that will make us feel more like we can cope.
- Let us use the fine crockery, tableware, cloth serviettes and silver utensils. Drag out the best linen and softest towels and celebrate home and family.
- Let us remember to pray for others, particularly for those for whom isolation means domestic violence. Have this link on hand for help if you or someone you know needs protection and advice.
- Let us remember to keep close to the LORD Who has gone to prepare a place for us, and is coming to take us Home with Him soon.
A moment of truth
It was about 1 pm, when we arrived and although we had been invited to come for a visit, we were appalled by the lack of cleanliness, the untidiness and the obvious squalor around us. But what horrified us most was my friend’s 12 month old nephew standing in a dirty cot, soiled nappy and ragged singlet, crying and flushed whilst his mother sat unperturbed reading in the dust covered living room.
My friend immediately swooped on her nephew and comforted him. She inquired of his mother if he was hungry- she replied that she had given him a bottle in the morning. We looked in the cot and there was an empty feeding bottle complete with flies on the teat. We felt revolted. The unmistakable odour of the soiled nappy was overwhelming and when my friend took it off to change the little fellow, it revealed red blistered welts where his nappy had been. Immediately the child was given a warm bath and his nappy rash was plastered in Vaseline- there wasn’t anything else in the house for it.
All the time, the child’s mother kept reading, seemingly oblivious to us. It was very disconcerting. We opened the fridge to get something for the little boy and it was growing all types of green mould. The milk was out of date. The pantry was under stocked to say the least, and all we could rustle up for the baby was an egg in bread crumbs. He was starving and we were angry and sad.
My friend rinsed out the soiled nappy and singlet and opened the lid of the washer. We exchanged shocked glances as the rancid smell of half washed clothes met our nostrils. As the clothes were going mouldy, we presumed they had been there a long time. And there was no excuse for this laziness, because the child’s father had bought his fiancee a new washing machine during the pregnancy.
What was wrong with this girl? She only wanted to do what she liked doing- reading. That was what consumed her time and life- books. Not her little boy or her impending marriage, (which didn’t take place fortunately) but just her desires were her life. She could not see anything wrong in that. And she was a very well read and quite intelligent woman. She was to come to see that it did matter indeed.
She told my friend’s brother when it all came crashing around her ears, that she didn’t want to have to keep the house clean, look after her baby and tend to his needs. She wasn’t harming anybody by reading and she couldn’t see what the fuss was about. We were incredulous that someone could be so self-centered and unenlightened about life. And totally indifferent to her child- not even a toy was in his cot the day we visited!
I couldn’t help but see the contrast between the Proverbs 31 woman and her. And I certainly wasn't evenly remotely close to this selfish woman. So I lightened up and relaxed a bit. I stopped being over perfectionistic and settled for a balanced approach. I enjoyed my children more. And I made sure that I never put off doing something just because I didn’t feel like doing it.
Now whenever I see a well-kept baby, I always remember another one- a sad, hungry and dirty little baby boy with a mop of blonde curls and a dirty nappy. And I thank God that He gave him into his Daddy’s caring hands.
© Glenys Robyn Hicks
Ecclesiastes 10:18 “By much slothfulness the building decayeth; and through idleness of the hands the house droppeth through,"
They will be wonderful wives and mothers
We need more of this!
I am not happy about this
God knows that women are entrusted with an eternal purpose of life: to serve Him, love their husband and nurture their children. And to be keepers of the home. "Therefore I desire that the younger widows marry, bear children, manage the house...' 1 Timothy 5:14c
Forgiveness and grace were shown to the woman caught in adultery: respect and love from God meant her life was spared. (John 8:3-12)
He created Woman to be loved, to be loving, to be nurturing, to be protected and to be respected. To us He gave to us the ability to bear a child and then to raise it for His glory. Any man can father a child, but it takes a loving woman to bear and raise it. No small matter. It takes a woman.
God knows that He can entrust women with eternal treasures, that's why He gave us the protection of marriage and the creating and keeping of a home: godly foundations on which to build a new generation of sons and daughters for Him.
Whilst men go to synagogues in Judaism, whilst men go to work and whilst men go to war, it is the women who carry the home, teach the children and bring them up unto Him. A worthy calling.
It is here that God meets with women in the mundane things of life, for He knows that the mundane is of great value, and so is a woman's service. And from love for womankind, comes a God Who meets us where we live: in our kitchen. In our baby's nursery. In the laundry.
To believe that women are forgotten by God is a gross misrepresentation of His love. It is we who keep the home fires burning and keep it all together when the world falls apart. No wonder God loves womankind.
© Glenys Robyn Hicks
“Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.” Proverbs 31:10
Not so bad after all
It was about 1 pm, when we arrived and although we had been invited to come for a visit, we were appalled by the lack of cleanliness, the untidiness and the obvious squalor around us. But what horrified us most was my friend’s 12 month old nephew standing in a dirty cot, soiled nappy and ragged singlet, crying and flushed whilst his mother sat unperturbed reading in the dust covered living room.
My friend immediately swooped on her nephew and comforted him. She inquired of his mother if he was hungry- she replied that she had given him a bottle in the morning. We looked in the cot and there was an empty feeding bottle complete with flies on the teat. We felt revolted. The unmistakable odour of the soiled nappy was overwhelming and when my friend took it off to change the little fellow, it revealed red blistered welts where his nappy had been. Immediately the child was given a warm bath and his nappy rash was plastered in Vaseline- there wasn’t anything else in the house for it.
All the time, the child’s mother kept reading, seemingly oblivious to us. It was very disconcerting. We opened the fridge to get something for the little boy and it was growing all types of green mould. The milk was out of date. The pantry was under stocked to say the least, and all we could rustle up for the baby was an egg in bread crumbs. He was starving and we were angry and sad.
My friend rinsed out the soiled nappy and singlet and opened the lid of the washer. We exchanged shocked glances as the rancid smell of half washed clothes met our nostrils. As the clothes were going mouldy, we presumed they had been there a long time. And there was no excuse for this laziness, because the child’s father had bought his fiancee a new washing machine during the pregnancy.
What was wrong with this girl? She only wanted to do what she liked doing- reading. That was what consumed her time and life- books. Not her little boy or her impending marriage, (which didn’t take place fortunately) but just her desires were her life. She could not see anything wrong in that. And she was a very well read and quite intelligent woman. She was to come to see that it did matter indeed.
She told my friend’s brother when it all came crashing around her ears, that she didn’t want to have to keep the house clean, look after her baby and tend to his needs. She wasn’t harming anybody by reading and she couldn’t see what the fuss was about. We were incredulous that someone could be so self-centered and unenlightened about life. And totally indifferent to her child- not even a toy was in his cot the day we visited!
I couldn’t help but see the contrast between the Proverbs 31 woman and her. And I certainly wasn't evenly remotely close to this selfish woman. So I lightened up and relaxed a bit. I stopped being over perfectionistic and settled for a balanced approach. I enjoyed my children more. And I made sure that I never put off doing something just because I didn’t feel like doing it.
Now whenever I see a well-kept baby, I always remember another one- a sad, hungry and dirty little baby boy with a mop of blonde curls and a dirty nappy. And I thank God that He gave him into his Daddy’s caring hands.
© Glenys Robyn Hicks
Ecclesiastes 10:18 “By much slothfulness the building decayeth; and through idleness of the hands the house droppeth through,"
Baby hunger and old ladies.
As a woman who is now a great-grandmother, I have come to realise that for most of us women, there is a deep desire to one day becoming a mother. It is how God created us.
Indeed, one sees this inherent virtue in young girls from the time they tenderly place blankets around their dollies or clasp a dolly to their breast in the first bloom of maternal love.
As is natural, after this first blooming, other factors come into play as they learn about the world, books and life. But the seed of maternal desire has been sowed and will spring up in later years.
Nurture of new life is a characteristic of womanhood and that nurturing endures for a lifetime. Ask any aged woman who has reared a family and she will tell you that it still presents itself. It presents itself in memories of her own children now grown, and later in her children's children. And if she is fortunate, in her grandchildren's children.
The ache for a baby to hold is still strong, even though the years for becoming a mother are well and truly gone. Each baby will be scrutinised, exclaimed over and rocked and the wonder of new life and a baby's sweet smell will transport a woman to earlier years and the time she first welcomed each new child of her own into her arms and life.
I remember once when we were at a wedding, my aged aunt begged me to allow her to hold my baby daughter, eagerly holding her arms out to receive her. At the time, I didn't realise how strong baby hunger is, until the last grandchild was born and my arms became empty.
There seem to be less babies these days, in part to feminism trying to tell us that a career is better than wiping little noses and bottoms and advise control of our fertility by having abortions. However, wherever there is a baby, you can be sure of two things- there will be other children and old ladies.
For the young ones, it brings a fascination born of that same inbuilt desire to love and nurture. But why old ladies? you ask. Because most times the God created desire to nurture and the love of new life remains long after the ability to beget children. A newborn brings back the memories of younger fertile years and the children born in that time. It makes her feel young again. Reborn.
Enjoy your children and grandchildren and always get plenty of cuddles. Baby hunger will be easier to cope with if you get a full diet of infant cuddles while you are still young....
I promise, you will feel that longing to fill your empty arms with a baby one day as baby hunger is very real.
© Glenys Robyn Hicks
He maketh the barren woman to keep house, [and to be] a joyful mother of children. Praise ye the LORD. Psalm 113:9 |
And so say most of us women!
The best journey of your life!
* That the time flies by so quickly that you should make time to enjoy your children-don't be left with regrets in the future
* It is best to keep a house that is clean enough to be healthy but dirty enough to be lived in-it will be too clean when the kids have left for good
* A self-willed child will often grow up to be a very conscientious hard worker and a loving person
Dying for a hug
Circles of her life.
Let's deck our halls and hearts
- Let us make sure we keep our homes clean and aired.
- Let us try to stay to a routine that gives us time to teach our children.
- Let us remember that our children will be picking up and hearing fearful information, so let us be particularly loving with them.
- Let us make meals that not only fill our family's stomach, but nourish them. Give them something to look forward to at meal times.
- Let us be loving with our husband- chances are he has worries about employment and like you, is concerned about how to stretch the finances and keep the roof over your head and food on the table.
- Let us try to avoid speaking constantly about the ills of this current state of the world in front of the children. They may be young, but they will take in a lot of fear. If the parents are afraid, then for them, it is the end of the world.
- Let us limit watching the news as this is bound to effect everyone. Limit news to finding out directly what you need to know and turn it off.
- Let us watch uplifting videos, especially with our children and let's play with them. Make a cubby house and let your children be the Mum and you the child. Use your imagination and delight them.
- Let us put our little ones into the bath and sit alongside them, singing songs and telling stories and blowing bubbles with them.
- Let us have a sense of calm and peace in our home, for everyone to enjoy.
- Let us be particularly attentive and available to our spouse and fan the flames of romance. It works wonders for a marriage.
- Let us sit at table and teach the little ones etiquette, and have the table set nicely to make it a time of pleasure and unity.
- Let us continue with a daily nightly bedtime routine for the children and keep regular sleeping hours.
- Let us pray with our children at night as they go to bed, allowing them to know that God loves them, watches out for them and calls all the stars by name. Invite discussion of any worries so that they can be reassured and sleep better.
- Let us keep up with our own appearance and hygiene, for that will make us feel more like we can cope.
- Let us use the fine crockery, tableware, cloth serviettes and silver utensils. Drag out the best linen and softest towels and celebrate home and family.
- Let us remember to pray for others, particularly for those for whom isolation means domestic violence. Have this link on hand for help if you or someone you know needs protection and advice.
- Let us remember to keep close to the LORD Who has gone to prepare a place for us, and is coming to take us Home with Him soon.